The more I see of man, the more I like dogs.

things i've learned

2011-04-22T20:18:00.003-04:00

i've learned....
-you can't make everyone happy, no matter how hard you try.
-maybe i don't want to try so hard to make everyone happy because it doesn't make me happy.
-i'm always going to be one of the people who is stressed to the max.
-being an insomniac is just part of my life.
-kids are sometimes the most honest voice we'll hear.
-looking in the mirror is harder some days than others.
-dogs truly are man's best friend.
-a husband who is a good listener is a blessing.
-a healthy, happy child is worth more than anything in this world.
-a good babysitter is hard to come by...and once you get one, you should treat them like the gold they are.
-i do my best thinking in the shower.
-i'm a guilt-ridden human being...sometimes that makes it very hard on my poor brain.
-i'm not someone who can just "let go". i'm a talker and i've got to talk it out, worry it around,
then talk some more.
-kids are very resilient....to a point. even up to that point, they're more resilient than most adults.
-no matter how much i want it to be true, life is just never going to be fair. people play dirty and
the game gets heated.
-knowing you did a great job is better than ever getting the credit for it.
-humbleness is a word we all need to evaluate more closely.
-we're all a little self-centered

running away with my heart

2011-04-12T17:04:00.002-04:00

i took this of drew over the weekend. it had rained really hard, then the sun came out and it was so warm and sunny. normally i hate it when the weather does that....if it's going to rain, i want the whole day to be rainy and lazy. however, this was our last real day of spring break so i was happy to get outside. drew loved the water running down the driveway so we rolled up his jeans and he played and splashed for over an hour. this is one of those pictures i will always treasure....

absence makes the heart grow fonder

2011-04-11T20:52:00.003-04:00

i haven't posted anything in a year. i had again forgotten my username and password to login. i forgot how much i loved keeping a blog. when i found my blog tonight and reread some of my posts from last year, i was sad because i have let a year go by without blogging. i think i've realized how important it is for me as therapy to write, as well as keeping a log to show drew when he grows up. not that he'll want to read any of it. my papaw has always kept little notebooks with things he jots down and thoughts he has...i'll admit, i've snuck and read them a few times. i did feel bad after because i felt like i'd invaded some private sector...i'm a little more open than that, maybe because of the generation gaps and the way society tends to air ALL their dirty laundry these days. i have been so wrapped up in working on national boards this year i've had very little time for anything else. until you do it yourself, you have no idea the time, stress and worry it entails. i've kind of blocked it from my mind at this point though since i turned the portfolio in...now i just have to wait to test in june. on a lighter note, we are going on our first vacation in over five years this summer. i don't know if i'm more excited because we are going or because i know all the fun drew will have. can't wait! i've learned a lot this year and some of the lessons haven't been ones i was expecting. i'm sure some of those things will come out in future posts...some you may or may not want to read, lol. i think need some form of therapy to get all the things in my head out or else i'm going to again find myself in a place that i don't want to be. though many of the lessons i've learned this past year have been hard and heartbreaking, i've also learned ones that have been uplifting and encouraging. i think i've griped a lot in the past year, and though i'll attribute some of that to the hollon genes, a lot of it has been habit and choice. it's much easier to b*tch about things than to let them go for me and i'm getting to a point where i'm really fed up with that part of myself. i've always been a worrywart and when i worry, i take it out on others....that's not fair and i don't want to be that person. (i will qualify that with the fact that i also believe you need to speak your mind sometimes....sometimes opinions stink, but they also need to be stated for our own sense of right or wrong.) "who never doubted, never half believed. where doubt is, there truth is -- it is her shadow." --ambrose bierce

marathon update

2010-04-11T12:40:00.003-04:00

well, so far i have been pretty pitiful at updating after long runs....i know, i know.
last week was supposed to be my 20 mile run -- my longest long run. unfortunately the weather wasn't cooperating and i was being a big wuss, so it was scratched. since we were on spring break, bobbi and i decided to meet and run tuesday. our plan was again to run 20, but we only made it to 10. between the heat, my mental bonk and the pain in my chest, i wussed out again.
so, yesterday we met to run -- and several of the girls that ran with us last summer were there, yay liz and renee! -- and i had no expectations. i figured i had tried twice and had major holes in my mental game, so i went in with no set distance. before we started i had decided i would do 14 at least and if i felt okay, i'd keep going as long as i could. turns out, third time is a charm!

i was very down after the second failed attempt...i know it seems funny to most people that i would be very disappointed with a 10 mile run, but i was....very. i thought about it and mulled over it all week. yesterday when we started out, i decided to go slow, steady and really run it like it was the marathon. for ten miles i was good, then i got a horrible blister and had to pause to bandage it up. unfortunately, that bandage didn't work so i tried again. after that second try, i just figured it was going to hurt either way, and plodded on like the 90 year old shuffler i look like -- and sometimes feel like -- when running.

i've concluded running a marathon is very much like getting pregnant and having a baby. there's a lot of training just like the nine months of carrying. if you had a smooth pregnancy, disregard this simile. i say that because neither has been easy in my experience. think back to all the morning sickness (22 weeks worth!), the uncomfortable body, the ravenous appetite, the sleepless nights....that's what training is like. now, those long, long runs and the marathon itself, i think that will be like labor, without the drugs. that feeling when everything really hurts, but you know eventually it will be over....the people giving you encouragement that you love and need, but is a distraction from your focus at times. then, the finish line, the time when you achieve the goal you set out for in the first place...even though you hurt, you're tired, you ache all over, you know you're going to have yet another sleepless, painful night, but you are still so happy and proud that you've achieved something you thought was unattainable....

i don't know if i'll look back on the marathon experience and say i want to do it again, but i wasn't sure i would say that after pregnancy and labor/delivery either. maybe i will...i would certainly experience and train for another beautiful baby, so who knows, maybe i'll feel the same about another marathon later.

after the 20 mile run i actually feel pretty good. i'm not too sore and i actually had a good run, it was the perfect day. i can only hope God will grant us a beautiful day and a strong, healthy body the day of the race. i hope he can help me with the mental fortitude once again and i am able to make it the additional 6.2 miles. i hope i don't bonk too hard, or run too slow. and i hope i enjoy the experience as much as i want to....

two weeks until lexington's first half!

2010-03-14T20:12:00.002-04:00

two weeks from today several of us will be running in lexington's first half marathon. i got a message friday there has been a cap put on the entries because there have been so many registrants, hooray! hopefully the weather will be nice and a few of our first timers will have a great 13.1 miles. i'm hoping for a better half than my experience in nashville last year with all the heat we experienced!

today jeanne, bobbi, april, allyson and i met to run our long run of 12. we dropped back down after last week's 16 miler so we could get a little rest in before the big 18 mile run next weekend. i've had some issues with my nose this weekend, not sure if it's because the weather has changed or what. the first 4 miles today were not fun. i think we're all feeling some discomfort, as is expected. jeanne is still having knee problems and bobbi is still battling pain in her hip....we just keep trying to push through. i think we all know something is always going to be hurting. ;)

on a sad note, our friend ragan got the news her sister passed away last night or early this morning today. (i'm not sure exactly when she found out.) her sister suffered from muscular dystrophy and was going to be turning 30 in the next few weeks. they had a huge party planned in gatlinburg for the weekend we are doing the half in lexington to celebrate. ragan has told us many times most of her sister's friends were no longer alive because of their disease. they are very lucky to make it to 30, so the celebration was going to be a big milestone. we're all praying for ragan and her family.

epic fail

2010-03-09T10:25:00.002-05:00

so, the failure on my part is that i had planned on blogging after all my long runs....so far, it's only happened once. :( we are now into week 11 of a 16 week training schedule. it was supposed to be an 18 week schedule but we got started a little late and had to cut two of the shorter recovery runs out.
i've been so busy with school, work, drew and running that i've barely had time to sleep. after our 16 mile run this past weekend, i finally crashed and burned with the whole sleep thing. the runs have been fairly good, with the exception of my 9 mile long run at the beginning of training. on that run, i was muy el sick-o, as skippyjon jones would say....
other than running and school work, drew has become a man of many words. for those that didn't already know, he broke my nose a little over a week ago. horseplay and a two-year-old don't work well for mommy. :) no surgery in the future, hopefully the ol' schnoz will stay in working order so i don't have to think of that in the future. now i'm just waiting for the tenderness and throbbing to pass.
i'll include new pictures in my next post, running out of time now....no pun intended. :)

back in black

2010-01-10T19:17:00.002-05:00

it's been so long since i blogged, i couldn't even remember my password! i figured things are going to get busy again soon so i might as well throw one more log on the fire.

sarah will be having baby asher soon and i can't wait to meet him. she looks absolutely adorable with her baby bump, i can't stand it! sarah and stad are going to be such good parents....and copper will be a fantastic older brother. :)

i am taking two classes this semester and one + my practicum in the summer, then i'll be finished with my masters....thank goodness! it's been a long road with a semester of bedrest, a new baby and taking two years off after undergrad. i'm so ready to have it finished, it's like a monkey on my back right now.

in addition to two classes and my baby boy, i've also decided to train for a marathon. yesterday was my first long run. jeanne is still a little on the fence about doing it, i think, but in the end, i think she will. she's done two mini's already and i've done one in record temps....we'll be doing another mini in march in lexington....hopefully she will pull through and be willing to help me. :) honestly, i can't imagine crossing the finish line on my own, and i don't want to. it's not nearly as much fun when you don't have someone there to share it with who knows exactly what you just put yourself through. i don't just mean on race day, i mean all the days after work when it's cold and you don't want to go out. or all the saturdays you spend hours running, preparing your body. or all the aches, pains, strains, sprains, bruises, unmentionable medical issues, etc. i cannot imagine doing all that alone.

i did register and reserve my hotel room so i suppose i'm in regardless. i want to do this very much. it has been a dream for a long time and i don't think i've ever believed in myself until now....i was determined that i could not complete a full marathon, but i think it's true that where there's a will, there's a way. i'm praying now for good health and no injuries. thank goodness i also have a great husband that is willing to keep drew on saturdays while i long run, and a wonderful babysitter that keeps drew so i can run right after school. it takes a village!

drew turned two in november and though i love to see him growing up and changing, i'm also always sad that he's getting big. mommy is another thing i wasn't really sure i could do; now i'm certain it is something i couldn't live without being. i want to make drew proud of me and for some reason, i feel as though showing him perserverance, endurance and dedication will help out in that area.

i've already told myself if (when!) i complete my first full marathon, i'll get another tattoo...i already have it picked out, so i'm dead set on doing this thing. i'll try to post after long runs to make myself keep this updated....i know i'll be happy i did when it's all over.

***********************************************************
first long run: 6.6 miles (whoops, jeanne, i miscalculated and we did a little more than scheduled)

weather: 19 degrees, wind chill of 12 degrees.....cold as crap!

the sidewalks were mostly still snowy so we had to run on the road and hope all the drivers saw us. jeanne and i ran 3.3 miles and then jennifer and marie met us and ran the rest of the way back. it helped a lot to have a fresh pair of legs to keep us going at that halfway point. in my mind i kept thinking, today we are completing a 1/4 marathon.

"you have to wonder at times what you're doing out there. over the years, i've given myself a thousand reasons to keep running, but it always comes back to where it started. it comes down to self-satisfaction and a sense of achievement."
-steve prefontaine

hunh

2009-10-20T18:39:00.002-04:00

i am almost 29 years old, and while i was cleaning the kitchen just now i realized something so silly. (my age comes in as a factor because i've gone so long saying this that i cannot believe it didn't hit me until now.)
you know how people say, "well, h-e-double hockey sticks"? for some reason, it just hit me that they really meant hockey sticks, like the ones you play the sport with. h-e-L-L! why did i not notice this before??? i think it's one of those things you get stuck in your head as a kid and just never really notice you're wrong....kind of like singing the wrong song lyrics. i always thought the "hockey sticks" were like horse "hockey"....as in stacking up horse hockey to make the letter L.

maybe because when someone in my family said it they also used the phrase horse hockey instead of saying sh*t. i think they were trying to get around saying the bad word in front of us and in the process they completely screwed over my thinking and interpretation. you also have to keep in my i am the same girl who assigns gender to letters, numbers and colors. i had no idea that wasn't something everyone did until tim and i got married and had that conversation one day.....good thing he'd already married me!

fall

2009-10-04T12:01:00.003-04:00

though summer is my favorite season, fall and spring come in at a close second. i really love fall, it's just that winter comes after and that i am not so fond of....
fall makes me think of all the things i love. having a baby makes many of those things even better. now that drew is almost 2, he's so fun and entertaining. here are some of the things he says and does that i absolutely love:

hand mommy, hand. -- when he wants to hold hands.
hold you! --when he wants to be held or picked up.
what's that? --imagine that 500 times a day. :)
wiz and wolly -- that would be liz and molly. i think liz is one of his favorite people.
cole and map -- nicole and matt, two of his other favorite people
shew, messy! -- after he threw up in his car seat on the way to school this week....and i had bus duty.
cancake -- pancake: he ate two at cracker barrel this morning!
truck
cossee -- coffee
whoa, baby!
oops daisy
his dancing -- he will only dance to single ladies. don't even think about trying a different song.
have it
kink-kuo -- thank you
peese -- please

there are so many more, i can't list them all.

some of the ones i'm not too wild about, but are still cute....sometimes:

why? -- imagine this one with his hands turned out to the sides....oh, boy.
fork -- he yelled that at cracker barrel this morning and it did NOT sound like fork. it sounded like the mother of all words.....
the whiny "mommy" -- it doesn't bother me at first, but after 4,000 times in an hour, it can start to wear you down. i still love that he can say it, no matter how many times, i have to think about that instead of getting irritated. :)
dammit -- and old standby
hush!

daddy worrrrrk

he has new boots for the fall and he's absolutely crazy about them. he's into all things boy including dirt bikes, motorcycles, tractors and big trucks. here's a picture of drew and daddy watching tractor trailer rigs drag racing....

hossy toss

2009-08-30T16:52:00.003-04:00

we went home yesterday to check on mam and pap and see mom and dad. drew loves seeing the horses when we go home and was calling for them before we even got out of the truck. once we went in, mom brought up one of kate's old rocking horses that we named "hossy toss". i can remember riding it when i was little and i actually thought it was mine. drew loves it and has been riding it constantly while singing something about a horsey.

he had a wonderful week with nicole and the kids and i'm so thankful. it's been harder on me this year leaving him....when he goes into nicole's in the morning, he goes to her, turns to me and says "bye-bye". ugh! i love that he loves her, but man that stings....:o) i am taking nicole's little girl, kayleigh, to school with me in the mornings and she is a sweetheart. she's in kindergarten this year and is so sweet and polite. an added bonus: she sings to me all the way to school!

i also got a class pet this week. it's a dwarf hamster one of my students from last year had. i'm afraid he misses her a little so i hope he comes to visit a few days a week after school. my class named her "bacon". really. i have no idea why but i thought it was hilarious. i'm terrified of rodents so this is a huge step for me. the funny thing is, i actually like her.

tomorrow we'll be back to the grind....work, then running. i'm ready to get another week started and finished. :o)

corn on the cob we picked yesterday with mam and pap....mmmm!

he decided daddy's belly would be a good place to ride hossy toss. :o)

end of a vacation

2009-08-23T17:21:00.003-04:00

school officially starts tomorrow. i've been cleaning like a mad woman the last two days trying to get everything spiffy before i have no time to do it. i know as soon as i get all the laundry done another load will be waiting for me, but it's so nice to have that 5 minutes when the basket is completely empty. :)

yesterday drew and i went to see mamaw...mine and his. my mamaw (drew's "big" mamaw) has finished 13 treatments and is now dealing with side effects. she was sick all night friday and can't eat because of the blisters in her throat. of course not being able to eat makes her sick to her stomach so she's just doing the best she can. i know she's incredibly tired, but she just keeps going, smiling and laughing as usual.

today drew and i played hide-n-seek...sort of. i hid, he came running calling "mommmmmy". waylon joined in and everywhere i went to hide, he sat right in front of me making me a target. when drew would find me he would do his twisty-tail run and fly back to the couch and wait for me to come tickle him. that game went on for a while, even with waylon ratting me out everytime.

tomorrow is a new day, a new week and the end of our vacation. aside from mamaw being sick, this has been one of the best summers i have had in a long time. drew was so much fun, i got to run nearly everyday, drew loved being pushed in the stroller when we ran and i read tons of books. now it's back to work, back to masters classes, back to cold weather. for now i've got to run, drew's decided he's going to clean out his closet and has half the stuff in the hall....life with a toddler--i don't think it could get much better. :o)

two gifts

2009-08-05T14:23:00.004-04:00

so far this has been a wonderful week. two of my best friends have had momentous occassions and have been so blessed. first, my friend sarah had a birthday monday....oddly enough she gave me a wonderful gift by letting me know she and her husband, stad, are expecting! i cannot tell you how excited i was to hear the news. :o) the baby is due in february. they are going to make wonderful parents. andy and cindy won't be too shabby at being grandparents either.

the second gift of the week was delivered yesterday. ashlyn cynthia hatterick made her debut weighing in at a whopping 5 lbs 12 oz. tim and i are so thrilled for angie and joe brett. i can't wait to hear all the baby stories over the next few years. ashlyn is definitely a lucky little girl.

mamaw started radiation yesterday. it was the first of 25 scheduled treatments. she will do 20 treatments, then they will assess her progress to see if she will need more or less than the original 25. hopefully less, but we know it's going to be a hard road for her, especially having to travel everyday. pray that she has strength and energy over the coming weeks.

milestones and antics of drew as of late:

he now weighs almost 27 pounds....doesn't sound like much until you lug him around.

he doesn't use the potty yet, but he loves to pretend he does and tell me he has to go poop...especially when we are in the car. he knows it's a ticket out of his seat so he grabs his behind and says, "poop mommy! potty!" today he made me take his diaper off so he could sit on the potty for 15 minutes....

he also wants to take a bath 10 times a day. i think he equates it to the pool and playing in water so he cries everytime he walks by the bathroom and tells me he wants a bath.

he knows a lot of words now. it's crazy how quick he picks them up. his favorite phrase is still "what's that?" and his favorite word is now damnit, (or as he says, "nannit!"). he learned it from his mamaw. :o)

he's been swimming in the pool with floaties on and doesn't want anyone to touch him. he's a little like his mommy in that he wants to do everything himself.
he is obsessed with bug, (that would be hayley), cycles, dogs, tractors, cows and food. no particular food, just all food in general. (again, like his mommy.)

see the potty?

he sat with her for almost an hour that night....amazing considering he is NEVER still.

"swimming, swimming in a swimming pool...when days are hot, when days are cold, in a swimming pool!"

random list

2009-07-22T18:48:00.002-04:00

i thought i should blog about a few things, so i have them to remember later on....if i get started on one however, i will go off on some long explanation and never finish. so, i'm just going to make a list.

drew is 20 months old now and i am having a really hard time dealing with him becoming a big boy.
potty training is going to be a nightmare.
we bribe our child with cotton balls to get him to brush his teeth. i have no idea why he likes them. he doesn't call them cotton balls though, he calls them an "easy". i guess because i always rub them on his face and say eeeeasy as i do it.
tim is a perfectionist. i love that about him, but sometimes it takes a long time to get something done. our new patio looks very nice though. :o)
our 4th anniversary is tomorrow.
my mamaw is a tough old bird. she starts her radiation next week. she will complete 25 rounds in 5 weeks.
mamaw has had breast cancer, hodgkin's disease and non-hodgkin's lymphoma all in less than 4 years.
my sister-in-law rue just got a job teaching technology at a school in denver. i'm so happy she and josh are able to be together now!
drew has funny names for my sisters and tim's brother. he calls kate "cake", hayley is "bug" and rob is "obbie".
drew's favorite phrase right now is "what's that?" he asks that question about 500 times a day.
i've run nearly 110 miles since school let out for the summer.
i really want to do a full marathon next spring.
i just realized my last three meals have been cheeseburgers and fries. 2 from mcdonald's and one from the burger barn. ("the burger barn, gilbert!" -- i have to say it everytime...have you seen what's eating gilbert grape? if not, nevermind that quote.)
i think i am an insomniac. really.
we may take drew for his first trip to the aquarium tomorrow....pray for us.
i can't wait for the midsummer night's run!

Realizations

2009-07-13T14:16:00.003-04:00

1. I've Come To Realize That My Boobs...HAVE BEEN EVERY SIZE, FROM A TO DD.
2. I've Come To Realize That When I Talk..I USUALLY DON'T FILTER MUCH.
3. I've Come To Realize That When I'm Driving...I'M SUSUALLY POINTING OUT THINGS TO DREW OR ANSWERING "WHAT'S THAT?"
4. I've Come To Realize That I Need....MY FAMILY, FRIENDS AND RUNNING TO GET ME THROUGH MOST DAYS.
5. I've Come To Realize That I Have Lost...THE NAIVENESS THAT COMES WITH BEING A KID
6. I've Come To Realize That I Hate It When...I GET THAT NERVOUS FEELING IN MY BELLY.
7. I've Come To Realize That If I'm Drunk...I'LL REGRET IT
8. I've Come To Realize That Money...IS PAPER THAT PEOPLE SLOBBER OVER LIKE FOOLS
9. I've Come To Realize That People...WILL ALMOST ALWAYS DISAPPOINT YOU IF YOU LET THEM
10. I've Come To Realize That I Will Always Be...A WORRY-WART
11. I've Come To Realize That I Have A Crush On...TIMMY JIMMY
12. I've Come To Realize That My Mom...HOLDS HER TONGUE ABOUT A LOT
13. I've Come To Realize That My Cell Phone Is...A TEXTING MACHINE
14. I've Come To Realize That When I Woke Up This Morning...I WAS BLESSED WITH ANOTHER DAY AND I REALLY HAVE NOTHING TO GRIPE ABOUT.
15. Last Night Before I Went To Sleep I Had Come To Realize...I AVOID A LOT OF THINGS UNTIL THEY MAKE ME SICK.
16. I've Come To Realize That Right Now I Am Thinking About...MAMAW
17. I've Come To Realize That My Dad...IS ANAL :)
18. I've Come To Realize That Today...IS GORGEOUS, SUNNY AND I GET TO BE HOME WITH MY BOY
19. I've Come To Realize That Tonight..I'LL PRAY A LITTLE HARDER.
20. I've Come To Realize That Tomorrow I Will...WORRY.
21. I've Come To Realize That I Really Want To....CONTROL MY FEARS, RUN A MARATHON, SOMEDAY HAVE A DOG RESCUE, BE STRONG AND MOST OF ALL, BE A GOOD MOMMY.

bluegrass 10,000

2009-07-04T21:18:00.004-04:00

i met tyler & marie this morning (along with aaron--who works with jenn-- and his wife, sarah) to head to lexington for the bluegrass 10,000. we met around 6:25 but didn't get going until about a quarter till 7. the race started at 7:30. with traffic, streets being closed off, mine and marie's pit stop in the civic center, (cause you know i don't do porta-potties), and us heading to what we thought was the starting line, we ended up late. most of you know, i do NOT like to be late....i think because the neiderman's were always late, it drove me crazy growing up because i couldn't do anything about it. anyway, i was actually calm, cool and collected and thought it was funny that we went to the finish line instead of the starting line, ha! we ended up having to run about half a mile (after walking a mile from the car) to the starting line as they were taking the gates down.....officials were yelling at us to hurry up. our time wouldn't start until our d-chip timing device crossed the electronic line so we had to run all the way up there to get started.

marie and i realized we actually made out well....we didn't have to stand and wait forever with all those people, (crowds, yuck!). plus, we didn't have to run around anyone for the first half mile. it was such a great run, beautiful weather and scenery and just an all-around good vibe. i really liked this race, it's probably been one of my favorites i've ever run. we were a little slow the first 3 miles but on the last 3 i could definitely tell a difference in my stamina from pushing the stroller everyday. i felt like i could have done the whole course again. i need to make sure i keep training with the stroller so i don't lose the stamina i've built up. even more than when we were training for the half with long runs, i felt really good when we finished.

last year's 10k. thank goodness it didn't rain this year!

we went to panera for the routine after-race coffee (and braided pecan roll for me!)...mmmmm, good coffee. as usual the conversation was random, hilarious and enlightening. thanks to my wonderful husband for staying home with drew and letting him sleep in, and for getting him to say "hi, mommy. love you." when i called after the race. so, so sweet. :)

we went home this afternoon to see the fam and go to a cookout at my uncle tom's new house. it was gorgeous, i love it. it was pap's birthday so we went over there, too. mam and i took a quick ride on the 4-wheeler up to the neighbor's to see her new puppy. (angie, you would have died had you seen it! i thought about putting him in my pocket and bringing him home with me!) mam dissed me on the ride back in favor of walking....this coming right after she told me she was a little tired. that woman never ceases to amaze me. she looked great today and her incision is looking better each day. she goes back to the doctor on the 8th so please say a prayer for good news on treatment options. i am really hoping for no chemo this time, it makes her so sick.

after drew said "bye-bye" to every individual person at uncle tom's (some people multiple times), we made it home....now if the poor boy would give it up and go to sleep we'd all be a little better off. no nap = cranky boy. :)

2009-06-26T13:32:00.003-04:00

jeanne and i were talking today about how some people don't understand that running is hard work. sometimes it feels easy, sometimes it really doesn't. everytime you go out, you have to make a choice as to what you want that run to be. do you want it to be a miserable, whiny experience that you don't enjoy? or do you want it to be an experience that makes you push hard, grin and bear it?

i've been pushing drew in the stroller this summer while we run. at first, i didn't think i'd make it two miles with him. i'd just finished a half-marathon and i didn't think i could even make it two miles. i made it three on the first try and i was proud of myself. now, some days i get a little help from my friends, some days i'm stubborn and want to see just how far i can push myself before i get sick....it's a weird thing that us runner's do to ourselves.....we see just how far we can go before giving up. i did four miles pushing drew on wednesday at 5:30 in the evening. it was 90 degrees according to marie's car when we started. yes, my quads felt like they were on fire. yes, my calves hurt like a mother and yes, i almost threw up for the first time in a long time. but i didn't throw up and i certainly didn't quit. running is much more a mental exercise than physical. i don't think many people understand that until they actually run. i've met some of the best friends i've ever had while running and more than anything, i think they're why i can keep doing it. we talk, we question, we gripe but most of all, we enjoy.

this post is about running, but it's also about the experiences we have in life and the choices we make. some people have very difficult things they face in their lives.....and often times people who can handle difficult things have them handed to them with more frequency than others. mamaw is once again facing a battle with lymphoma and it just makes me think of all the times i want to wimp out and not run. i know it's not on the same scale by any means, but it's all i have to compare.....if i had her mental fortitude, her strength and bravery, i'd probably be blowing records off the charts in my running endeavors.

the irony of my running and my relationship of that running to mamaw, is though i always feel like i'm running for her, she hates that i run. :)

"It hurts up to a point and then it doesn't get any worse." - Ann Trason

Running is a big question mark that's there each and every day. It asks you, 'Are you going to be a wimp or are you going to be strong today?--Peter Maher

a lady named gigi

2009-06-23T12:22:00.002-04:00

drew and i just got back from the grocery....this morning's trip was a little different from most. for one, he sat nicely in the buggy the whole time and i was actually able to think. i also remembered to actually take my list in the store with me, that doesn't happen much.

as we were getting ready to check out, i was looking at books and i notice drew smiling and looking over my shoulder. when i turned around, an older lady was standing a few feet away giving drew a thumbs up. she started talking to him and they jabbered back and forth for a few minutes. the next thing i know, this lady is handing drew money telling him to go buy himself something. i tried to give it back to her but she was having none of it. she was only interested in drew and the big smile he gave her when she handed him the money. she told him her name was gigi and asked what his name was. evidently gigi has been choosing kids over the years that she thinks are acting nicely, and she gives them a dollar. for years and years she's done this. she told me a woman walked up to her a few years ago and asked if her name was gigi. when she said yes, her adolescent daughter was standing next to her and they said they remembered the old woman because she once gave their daughter a dollar when she was just a baby.

as we left gigi to go check out, she told me there was no telling how much money she'd given away but it made her feel good so she kept doing it. she said she was a "jesus lady" and that's what she liked to do. some people take singles to the strip clubs....gigi takes them to wal-mart. wonder what the teller at the bank thinks when she asks for all those singles?

update

2009-06-08T15:10:00.002-04:00

school is finally out! this is our first full week out, even though i have to go to work on friday...bluh. however, drew and i have been enjoying our time at home. i love not having to wake him up at 6:30 every morning. we get up around 8:00, eat breakfast, drew gets a bath and then we go for a run. he is loving getting to play on the playground at school when we finish...it's too sweet.
i got a new jogging stroller since his other one just wasn't standing up to a near daily run. the new one has a place for my ipod, so i can plug it in and the stroller has speakers that play the music.
jeanne ran with me today and commented on my eclectic taste in music....one minute disney, the next ac/dc.
it's a hard run pushing 55 lbs, especially uphill. it's the only way i'll get to run though, and it's great for my arms -- you wouldn't believe how much arm strength it takes to push.
we hit the pool yesterday and i'm thinking about it again today when drew wakes up. he's been taking a nice nap when we get home from our run and playground jaunt. i can actually sit down and eat without someone pulling at my legs wanting a "bite-bite". i've been neglecting household duties though.....it's just too nice outside when he's asleep for me to sit in the house and do laundry and clean. i can do that when he gets up or tim gets home. i'm learning not to feeling guilty about that, (as i get ready to go get clothes to hang out).
hopefully i'll update more since we're out of school.....:)

long time gone

2009-05-04T19:20:00.003-04:00

it's been a while....i've been putting off blogging until i could get pictures of the half marathon in nashville. i can't get them copied so i'll just have to put the link in. if you can't see any pictures when you get to the site, you'll have to type in my last name or my bib number to see the pictures of marie and i. my bib number was 25163.
i look like i am ticked in every picture (while marie smiles, lol) but i did enjoy myself....i just think a lot while i run and have to concentrate on blocking out all the people.

direct link: http://www.asiorders.com/view_user_event.asp?EVENTID=45789&BIB=25163&LNSEARCH=1

if you can't view with the first: http://www.asiorders.com/view_event.asp?EVENTID=45789

i think i had a better time the day after when i could kind of take in the enormity of what we'd just done. i guess if you've never done it, it's hard to describe just how hard it can be. we ran in 86 degree weather on more hills than i've ever done before. it was a constant zigzag. there were several bands, lots of spectators - many who handed out much needed food/snacks, water, etc. there were so many people it was unreal. i did really well with the crowd until after the race. they were herding everyone out of one little corral about 10 feet wide. that doesn't sound too bad unless there are 32,000 people coming out of that one corral. i started seeing black and feeling like i was going to punch someone. i know, not nice...the chick with the bull horn yelling at us to keep moving was about to get my sweaty fist planted in her little stomach...lol.
we made it out, though and i owe tyler and marie a big thanks for searching high and low for where tim was parked with me. just when i thought i couldn't take another step, we spotted him. i was grimy, hungry, hot and by that point, crying. drew was absolutely covered in horrible welts so we headed home that day. i did want to see a few of the sites while we were there but i guess it wasn't meant to be that weekend. thank goodness drew finally cleared up as the week went on. the best we could tell, he seems to be allergic to tide detergent. never again will we be using that one!

drew had so much fun in the motel. i sprayed everything down with lysol when we got there because i knew he'd touch everything. and what did i forget? a towel!

tim always looks like he has smoke in his eyes....if they're open at all.

we tried....

this was sunday after we had to take drew to the urgent treatment center. when he woke up, the rash was much worse. his eyes and the bridge of his nose were so swelled. he looks much better here after a dose of benadryl and prednisone. he had welts on his feet and couldn't even walk....so pitiful.

easter pictures

2009-04-18T20:14:00.005-04:00

EASTER

waylon was checking to see if there was anything for him.

what?!?

gigi helping drew find eggs.

papaw hides easter eggs under his toboggan.

drew and aunt rue

a quick nap on the way home

easter eve

2009-04-11T10:37:00.003-04:00

yesterday i finished getting all drew's stuff for his easter basket. we went to hobby lobby and picked up a few little last minute things. (i was surprised i didn't see you there, angie.) :)

they didn't have much of a selection of boys' baskets left but we did find a really cute one drew liked. i know i waited until last minute so i didn't expect there to be many left....they were 50% off though!

i found a child's size broom there, too. drew is obsessed with sweeping and constantly carries the broom around. maybe he'll be able to handle this one a little easier. i also found a book that i put his picture in and all the characters in the story then have his face. though his basket looks a little fuller than last year's socks and book, i don't think i went overboard. he's got a ball, bubbles, a small chocolate bunny (because mom said i had to, it's easter!), a few "grow your own" tub toys, a broom and a book. mom also got him a blue rubber ducky since he also adores ducks.

**on a sidenote, yesterday after the big storm, we had two ducks going down our backyard...how odd.**

i'm sure he'll probably want to play only with the empty plastic eggs, but hey, i had to fill the basket with something. :) here's a few pictures of the basket and of the sky behind the house during the storm. we had so much hail it was crazy. there was a tornado touchdown about a mile or two behind the house when i took these pictures....

see that little brown puppy? angie made him a picture frame with one of those on it and he always wants to get it off....when he saw it yesterday in the store he started screaming, "puuuppyyy!"

postscript

2009-04-08T22:39:00.003-04:00

many of you know my cousin, budge, and the stories that are often shared about him. since Easter is sunday, I had to include this before i forget about it....here are a few of the latest budgisms:

today gig was going to take budge home after school. they were at the office locking up and budge continued to ask questions about everything.....one of them being Easter. gig told him all about Easter, why we have it, etc.
a few minutes later he says, "hey gig? why does this God guy think he's the boss of everybody anyway?"
he checks the oil price every morning on the stock market crawl on the news channels. last week he walked into the kitchen and said, "dad, oil fell to $48 a barrel," shaking his head and looking forlorn.
when he told mamaw this later he asked her, "you do know i'm in the oil business, right?"
"mom, i like sports. i like basketball and baseball but i just don't think i want to play any of those." pause....

"i believe i'll take up fencing."
papaw said he was going to bring him a tobacco stick so he could practice his fencing in the house...ha!

budge, (who has a beautiful name that no one calls him, even at school he's "budge"), just turned 6 years old a few months ago. what will he say next?

spring break can finally begin

2009-04-08T14:14:00.005-04:00

i know today is wednesday, and we are halfway through our spring break, but for me it didn't officially start until this afternoon. i finally went to the dentist and had my root canal. the wonderful thing is, it didn't hurt one bit. wouldn't you know, i'd worry myself sick and then i didn't even feel anything.
for the last week or so i have not been feeling well. i thought it was just a queasy stomach because i had pukers at the end of last week. take that and combine it with a very intense fear of the dentist and some sort of bug and my last 5 days have been anything but enjoyable. luckily saturday i felt fine and was able to do some shopping with mom, mam, gig and hayley. sunday the bottom dropped out. we got up and had plans for the whole day yet my revolting stomach had other plans. we did make it to boonesboro to the playground so drew could go and play outside for a while. we stayed maybe 45 minutes then we had to go....i told tim last night if i wasn't sure it wasn't morning sickness, i'd be very scared. luckily i never really got sick except for sunday when we made it home. it's been more or less just a horrible nauseous feeling high in my stomach. funny, today after visiting the dentist it's not there anymore.
for the last few days drew and i have just chilled around the house. he's played and been so good. i think he knew i didn't feel good. today i got him up at the last minute to go to carla's while i went for the root canal. he seemed fine and i gave him a little milk and some breakfast to take to carla's. by the time we got there, i looked in the mirror and noticed his nice clean clothes were covered in....well, yuck. he'd spit up everywhere. (and by saying spit up, i really mean puke. how long can you call it spit up when they're babies anyway???) so, i had to take him in, strip him, clean him off...carla got one of abby's shirts for him to wear and he again seemed fine. i was worried about leaving him, hoping he wasn't really sick thinking maybe i should call and cancel my dentist appointment....i didn't.
by the time i got to the dentist i was a few minutes late because of the puking incident and mam and pap were in the waiting room twiddling their thumbs. i told her not to come, she comes anyway. what am i going to do with her?
at this point, i've worked myself up to a mini panic attack in the car thinking "shit, i'm gonna pass out if i don't stop it". i went back to my labor meditation tricks, counting and breathing. what a dork, i know. once i got into the waiting room, i pretty much lost it...crying, the whole bit. i really am terrified. i felt like an idiot. why couldn't they just give me some valium and make me act like a normal person before these visits? this is exactly why i haven't been to the dentist in almost 8 years.
once i went back, lovely dr. hill told me not all dentists are created equal and he would not hurt me. i guess that's the same thing we all want others to remember about us -- don't judge or make decisions based on past experiences that were only bad. i can remember many, many trips to dr. hill when he would pull two and three teeth and he never once hurt me. today, he did not hurt me. i felt nothing, hallelujah. i even made another appointment for a cleaning in a few weeks. that is truly progress for anyone who knows me. hopefully i won't cry next time. i cornered monique, the hygenist, before i left and told her if i came back she had to promise not to hurt me. with wide eyes, she promised. we'll see.

"mommy, don't touch!"

not much

2009-04-03T21:08:00.002-04:00

`spring is here. spring break makes me happy.

`only a few short weeks and we'll be out for summer.
`went to matrix tonight to watch destiny and trinity. wow.

`shopping tomorrow with the girls.

`glad it's friday.

`dreading the wednesday dentist appointment.

`registered for a fall class.

`couldn't get registered for a summer class. ahhh!

`already thinking about what to eat @ lunch tomorrow. :)

`love when my baby is so, so sweet.

`glad tim is home early.

`ready for pie.

`ready for bed.

kitty

2009-03-30T19:49:00.005-04:00

tonight my neighbor came to ask where "miss" kitty had been for so long. i had to regretfully inform her that miss kitty is no longer with us. our neighbor sandy is an animal lover like me....when she came over tonight, ruby actually laid down at her feet and sat there. have you any idea how amazing it is for ruby to be still?

anyway, this post is for kitty.

last thursday made three weeks and two days since kitty had been missing. she's done this before but has always come back home. i suppose i was still holding out hope that she would come back. now, kitty was not nice. actually, as my mom frequently called her, she was a b*tch. but i liked her and i don't even like cats very much. she kept to herself, didn't complain, didn't ask to be rubbed on all the time and oddly enough, she loved drew. she wouldn't let anyone else touch her....tim was the only one and he would get maybe two good strokes down her back and she would turn around and attack him -- literally drawing blood. however, she must have sensed she would meet her demise had she scratched drew so she cautiously sat through his "petting" that inadvertently turned into heavier petting, then smacking and tail pulling.

when marie and i were running last thursday, we were on mile 6 when i noticed something laying in the grass by the road. i looked and yelled to her, "hey, i think that's my cat!" my friend shannon really got a kick out of this part of the story because i didn't stop running. when they asked me if i stopped i felt a little guilty but, it would have messed up my running time. luckily i was able to get another look on my next two trips by and was 99% positive it was her.
the only thing i could think of was that she had been out one night when it turned cold so she got up in my car to stay warm. the next morning she must have ridden in the undercarriage of the car and jumped out when i got to school. this is a long trip and i'm surprised she made it that far but that scenario has happened to me before.
i made tim go back by school yesterday on our way to beattyville to check and see if it really was her. we determined it most likely was and on our way home we used bright yellow dollar store bags and a coffee pot box mamaw supplied us with and got her into the box to take home. a few people drove by and i was hoping they wouldn't be parents/students of mine so i wouldn't have to explain what tim and i were doing when i got to school this morning. two adults standing in the pouring rain with a coffee pot box, dollar store bags as makeshift gloves, the back hatch of the highlander up and a screaming baby....what a picture.

we did get kitty home, wrapped her in her uk blanket and buried her down by the willow tree. i have a real soft spot for animals as most of you know, and i could not leave her on the side of the road like a bloated possum.

so, here's to kitty. i hoped she enjoyed her short 3 years in our home. i hope she enjoyed the hundreds of moles she laid on the doorstep; the baby birds she stole out of the wren's nest last year; the times she snuck in and laid on my bed, or the couch, or the recliner. i hope she enjoyed not getting banished when i found her asleep in drew's car seat once last year and i hope she enjoyed the warm place to lay, the food she was always fed and a dog that really adored her. she will be missed. rip, kitty cat, rip.

garbage bags, a lot of green and shaven heads

2009-03-14T20:14:00.004-04:00

the garbage bags came into play this morning for our shamrock shuffle run. as i got all decked out in my green waco loopers shirt, i realized it was going to be a cold, wet run through the streets of lexington. i was excited however, because these runs with friends are always fun no matter what the weather. i realized this morning as well that we are becoming holiday runners....we did the thanksgiving morning run in 25 degree weather, the reindeer ramble in 20 degree weather (and in a bunny suit) and now a st. patrick's day run in a temperature around freezing with pelting rain. and to think, we pay to do these runs. ahhhh.

anyway, back to the garbage bag -- luckily jeanne thought to bring a box of garbage bags to use as ponchos. so, i tore three holes - one for my head and two for my arms - pinned my number on and we set off. marie and i got caught behind all the walkers but still managed to finish in 16:37. oh, and my dang shoe came untied as we hit the first mile! it was fun though and we all caravaned over to panera afterward for a postrun snack. mmmmm do they have good coffee! i'm hoping jennifer and marie will post pictures and i can rogue them since i didn't have my camera with me...hint, hint. when i got home i checked the race times and squealed loudly when i saw that jeanne won 3rd in her age group - congratulations, jeanne! :)

tim, drew and i came home, got drew down for a nap and i got a shower to both warm up and clean up. i went back to lexington this afternoon to volunteer for the st. baldrick's fundraiser at o'neill's pub. they raise money for children's cancer research by getting people to volunteer to shave their heads. most of you know one of the ladies that keeps drew a few days a week has a son that was born with a brain tumor. they had no idea before he was born and when he was three days old he went in for surgery to remove the tumor. connlay will turn one on the 18th of this month which is such a blessing and miracle. drew loves him and he adores nicole, connlay's mom. connlay's dad, matt, and grandfather, "bob-bob", raised money and shaved their heads today. many of you donated money to them for this cause and they ended up raising over $3,000 at last count!

the shavees were asked today to get up and share their stories before they went bald and when bobby took connlay on stage and shared his story i couldn't help it when the tears came. i was so happy they were able to celebrate such a wonderful occasion and that i could be a small part of it. my job as a volunteer became a bit hectic trying to keep all the shavees organized and money envelopes where they were supposed to go. this was such a great experience i can only hope i can be part of it again. on a sidenote, all the men were shaved looked surprisingly good after their turn on the shaving stool....one man's wife even offered to pay $1000 on the spot if he would not shave his head. he said he raised money with the intention of shaving it for his donors so the stylist promptly took a wide strip right off the top. :)

seeing and hearing some of those stories today made me even more thankful that my baby is so blessed and healthy.

i did get a few pictures of matt and bobby but they were with my phone so they aren't of great quality. if nicole or liz got better ones, i'll be sure to post them. in the meantime, enjoy.

bobby and matt ready to go.

yes i'm from eastern kentucky, but that does not mean i am toothless....yet.

2009-03-09T19:51:00.005-04:00

in the last week i have finally had to give in to an 8 year hiatus from the dentist. after my last visit to my dentist/orthodontist when i was in college, she nearly killed me and i swore i would never go back again. tuesday as i was sitting in the hospital waiting room having bloodwork done, i came to the conclusion that i was going to have to actually go. i had made the appointment the day before with my old childhood dentist but i don't think it sunk in until the next morning. the odd thing is, i could not wait to go. i thought anything was better than the horrible pain i was constantly experiencing.

as i sat and listened to my audiobook, sTori Telling, during my bloodwork, (I know, the book was a guilty pleasure but it was very interesting), the throbbing continued to get worse and worse. i went to the hospital pharmacy and bought yet another bottle of tylenol. i'd already taken a bottle of advil since last thursday when the pain began to get unbearable but i couldn't help it, i was a little out of my head i think. it's a wonder i didn't just turn the bottle up and down a bunch. i really considered ripping the red wax off my bottle of jim beam (that i proudly made at the distillery) and taking a few advil with that but thought better of it. anyway, i went to the dentist, they took and x-ray and wonderful dr. hill said, "oh yeah, that's a dead nerve in that tooth with a lot of infection at the root." oh.

my next question was "what are you going to do to me?" he laughed in his slightly maniacal way (that i love) and then became very serious saying, "you do want to keep the tooth, right?"

in my head i was screaming I DON'T CARE! pull the flippin' thing right now if you want, just make it stop hurting!

i go back for a root canal during spring break. what's really bad is that i scheduled a root canal around my running schedule. i've got 5 miles to do that morning before i go.....

after driving from home to waco and back to richmond that morning, i had gone to irvine to dr. hill's then from irvine all the way to the pharmacy in richmond, back out to get drew in waco, then back to the pharmacy. i think i ran out a tank of gas that day but it was worth it because at the end of the day i picked up some wonderful pills and headed on home. thank goodness tim's mom called and wanted to take drew home for a little bit because i was completely done. i went to bed at 6:00 tuesday evening and did not get back up until friday morning at 10:00. tim had to bring drew down to say good morning and good night. i cried because i couldn't get up and take care of him....what a horrible feeling.

i was swelled worse than when i had my surgery on my mouth because all the infection was drawn out into my face. i knew it was bad but i didn't think it was that bad until jeanne and jennifer let out their ohhhh's today when i showed them the pictures. yes, i documented. nice, huh? i don't even remember taking the picture the first day. wonder what else i don't remember from last week?

i'm much better now and thank you to all my buds that called, texted (because you know i'm not answering a phone, ha!) and brought me a frosty. :) you guys are such good friends....and true friends. how do i know? because you give me your honest opinion about what my face really looked like, thanks.

and because i have no vanity left, here are the pictures documenting my face explosion.

a little perspective -- this is what my face normally looks like.

day 1

day 2

day 3

day 4

i kept drew with me on friday (day 4) and i think i swelled back up a little because i was up much more than i had been all week.

ooooh, what a mess!

2009-03-01T13:55:00.004-05:00

tim and i are going to get new carpet in the next week or two....it is much needed and we've already been to pick out the carpet and set up times for them to come and measure the house. we have wanted to remove the brick in the basement living room since the day we moved in but we've never had the chance because we would have had to replace the carpet immediately. the brick from the fireplace was extended out by the builders of the house about 5 feet and shaped in a semi-circle. it was an absolute waste of space and u-g-l-y. we've always just placed the couch in front of it so you can't see it....drew now has a facination with the brick and we can't keep him off of it when he's downstairs.
today was the day we started tearing all that brick out. oh my, what a mess. bob came over to help tim while i took care of drew upstairs. oddly enough, a one year old is not the greatest helper when it comes to demolition. ;)
the boys didn't think they would be making as big of a mess as the demo turned out to be so they didn't move anything out of the basement before starting. the couch is now covered in brick dust along with the t.v. stand and all the other doo-dads down there. i snapped a few pictures to document just how big a mess this is becoming as they began moving stuff out.

you can see all the dust on the lens of my camera.

in the end, i'm so happy to be getting rid of the awful brick, i don't even care about the mess. after we get the brick torn out we have to repaint. the color is not good and we're going to paint before the new carpet is laid.
i've also included a few pictures of drew....of course. these are when i went in to get him up from an unusually long nap and he didn't wake up right away like he usually does. i actually had time to run and get my camera and get one of him fast asleep. the other is right after he woke up. so sweet. :)

tornado watches are beginning to get old

2009-02-18T17:58:00.003-05:00

last wednesday we had tornado warnings, this week tornado watches....and now it's going to get cold again tomorrow. not only do these things get the kids all excited, today i wasn't even there when it happened. my main concern was whether i need to go get drew and just leave the doctor altogether but the radio said it was just severe storms, no tornados had shown up on the radar.
thank you to angie who was watching my class so i could go get "felt up", lol. (this was not at all what i was expecting when i went to the doc today, but i guess you have to suck it up sometimes.) it's always a big deal when storms come through because angie is not one to enjoy them, she's a little scared of the wind. just to show how much i appreciate you ang, i'm going to post a most flattering picture of you with your rolly cart....i know you'll love it. :)

even though the storms are getting in the way of my running schedule, today when drew and i were going home we saw the neatest double rainbow. one was very bright and i tried to take a picture with my phone but couldn't zoom in very close. this is the best i could do while driving.

enjoy the rest of this warm day, tomorrow is going to get cold!

25 random things

2009-02-11T20:25:00.002-05:00

1. i have to have a diet coke with my coffee every morning. heavy on the cream, absolutely NO sguar. if i don't, watch out.
2. i am crazy for dogs. i love lots of animals, but dogs are my favorite. (cats kinda creep me out.)
3. i am afraid of the dark. still. one too many stories of "who stole my golden arm".
4. i secretly love teaching....i know i complain about it sometimes, but i love my kids.
5. when i was little, i would make chocolate chip cookies, then hide them in my sock drawer so i could have them for breakfast.
6. running makes me feel like i'm accomplishing something. everytime i finish i always feel proud of myself. i will run my first half marathon in april and i can't wait to cross the finish line.
7. I. AM. COMPETITIVE.
8. the kids at school call me the candy monster....i don't know why. :)
9. i have so many pet peeves it's ridiculous....slow drivers, listening to people eat, tapping noises, dishes in the sink...many, many more.
10. i take 2 showers a day, sometimes 3.
11. i'm a bit obsessive and a lot sarcastic.
12. i love reading. i will read just about anything...cereal boxes, books, reader's digest, stories online, news, textbooks.....angie got me hooked on Us Weekly a few years ago and now my mother-in-law brings them to me every week from their store so that solves my magazine fix. christina brings me books so that solves my book fetish.
13. i'm very self-conscious though a little less since i've had drew. after having a baby, humility kind of flies out the window.
14. when i was little i always wanted to be a country singer.
15. i used to burn holes in my papaw's recliner with a magnifying glass and the sun coming through the window. of course i swore i didn't know how those holes got in the arm of the chair.
16. my brother, jim bob (our friend) and i used to entertain ourselves by having acorn fights. we each got a 5 gallon bucket, collected all the acorns we could find, then hid behind trees and launched them at each other with slingshots. yes, it hurt.
17. i met my husband at storyhour when we were 3 or 4. we have some very neat pictures together when we were little.
18. sometimes i cuss. okay, a lot of times i cuss. the bad thing is, most of the time i don't feel guilty about it.
19. i only went out to a bar one time in college. within 15 minutes we were thrown out. not really my scene...
20. i love so many different types of music: bluegrass, ac/dc, journey, john prine, the steeldrivers, seven mary three, boston, BRUCE!, rod stewart, perry como, elton john, george strait, dean martin....the list goes on and on.
21. i love mashed potatoes and peas mixed together.
22. i worry. a lot.
23. i'm addicted to reality t.v. -- real housewives, real world, intervention, i survived...., cops, bad girls club....
24. tim and i have been together over ten years.
25. i do want more kids but i agree with brittany, i want to enjoy drew as a baby as much as i can first.

a lot has happened

2009-02-05T17:07:00.005-05:00

boy, since the last time i blogged it seems like so much has happened! first of all, our electricity went out last tuesday and didn't come back on until this monday. the lights i can do without, but i love my hot water! below are some pictures of what drew did as soon as we were completely out of hot water....you'll see why we needed it, badly.

mamaw went for her biopsy monday and today the results came back showing NO cancer. we are so, so thankful and know that prayers make such a difference. she has been recommended to a neurologist for the pain in her back but i'm not sure she will go. i was already using my powers of persuasion to try and get her to go when i called today....maybe she will, we'll see.

next, i am so very excited to say angie and joe brett are expecting their first little one in august. sometimes i'm not sure who's more excited, them or me! :) ha, ha. whether we have little pink outfits for a baby girl, or those texas longhorn colors on a boy, this is going to be one very lucky baby.

and last, tim just got a call that his dad was hit head on on his way home from work today. thank goodness he is okay except for a few cuts and bruises on his head. evidently two boys crossed the yellow line and hit him head on @ natural bridge. two wrecks in two months where he's totalled his trucks....the good thing is his truck is big and he was not hurt. he needed a new work truck anyway, his had 400,000 miles on it and it was only 7 years old!

my sweet boy...we learned how to do lots of new things when the electricity went off.

had ruby not been laying on the couch peacefully, i would have suspected she was the culprit in the next picture.

two minutes alone and this is what you get! in the time it took him to walk from the living room to the kitchen, and me to pick up a few toys, this is what happened. an entire FAMILY size container of spaghetti sauce was somehow opened and dumped on the kitchen floor. of course, drew had just had a bath with the last of the hot water so clean up was a little tricky....have you ever noticed how pasta sauce stains tupperware? well, drew was a little stained when this was all over, it wouldn't come off!

WHAT?

yes, ruby is licking the sauce off his feet while i cleaned the floor.

no more beautiful pear tree, ugh!

♥ news ♥

2009-01-27T13:43:00.002-05:00

mamaw ended up going to the doctor yesterday for her MRI because they were worried the weather would be too bad today....it was a good thing because they actually closed the office today due to ice. dr. horn (her oncologist, who just happens to be her homeboy, ha!) called this morning to let her know the spot was so small he could not positively identify it as cancer. given her history with the two cancers however, he did think this is most likely the case.

her next step now is to return to his office on monday and have a biopsy by needle aspiration. if they are not able to get the biopsy that way, they will have to make an incision and do it surgically. this isn't great news because we know the cancer is more than likely back, but it is much better news than we thought it would be. it's always so touch and go and the waiting game is torture. i talked to mam and pap both this morning and they are in good spirits considering all they have on their minds. so now, we wait.

But if we hope for what is still unseen by us, we wait for it with patience and composure. Romans 8: 25

juicy baby, salty tears

2009-01-26T11:25:00.003-05:00

so jennifer keeps using the word "juicy" lately. this is hilarious when we are running and she yells it out at me just as i feel i'm having a heart attack....always good for a laugh, especially when i need one, thanks jenn. ;)

i hope everyone is enjoying their snow day. to tell the truth, i was unhappy when i got my text this morning. i really, really wanted to go and get another day in. yes, it's nice to sleep in but man this is gonna stink in may. rest and enjoy, i suppose...

i think i amy have needed the snow day, even though i really didn't want another. we've had a very difficult weekend and it's been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. drew had my phone on the way home friday and had thrown it somewhere in the car. i did not find it until saturday afternoon when we were getting ready to go home to see my family. when i dug the phone out from under drew's carseat, i had 6 missed calls and 3 voicemails. i immediately knew something was wrong because no one ever calls me. mom had called five times and mamaw once. when i check my messages mom just leaves a short diddy saying i need to call her, she has something she needs to tell me. next, i get one from mamaw telling me she's okay, despite what anyone else had called to tell me. you know that sinking feeling you get in your stomach? the one where you know the bottom is getting ready to drop out and there's not a damn thing you can do about it? yep, that's pretty much the feeling i got.

i called mom back and she first asked where i was...when i told her we were headed home, she sounded relieved that i wasn't there yet. she then told me what i had a premonition of....mamaw had gone for her latest PET scan and it had not come back good. there is a bright spot showing up on the scan on her back. they don't know anything but that at the moment but it's terrifying. i know she's terrified even though she would never say it. luckily i was able to think about things and get myself together before we got home. i feel like i'm becoming an old pro at hearing this news and being able to get myself together enough to make mam believe i'm not too upset. most of you know how much she means to me so you know it isn't easy for me to keep myself happy and positive when we're looking down this road once again. i think i'm more worried about the location of the spot than anything. as those of you at waco know, the first thing that came to my mind was mrs. duerson at silvercreek....a spot near or on the spine. since mam has had both breast cancer and hodgkin's lymphoma, it's really worrisome either way. many times breast cancer comes back in the bone and lymphoma often comes back in/near the diaphram. if the lymphoma passes over one side of the body to the other, it becomes more advanced.

my best friend sarah had just posted something on her facebook page that struck me...she had posted that she was "trying hard not to lose her faith in what is right and good." oddly enough, she had posted it on the day mam had gone to the doctor. i've always believed in fate, and maybe this is God's way of sending me a sign to keep my faith and just give it to him. as i told sarah though, i'm angry this time. when does this end? will this eventually take her from us or is there some purpose and reason God keeps putting this burden on her? seriously, 3 times in under 4 years??? haven't we learned what we're supposed to from these illnesses? maybe she keeps getting it because she's the only one strong enough to handle it. but isn't that just the way it goes for a lot of us.....you can handle it so we'll just keep giving it to you.

i am trying very hard to not lose sight and faith in what is right and good. i suppose this could be more devastating if it were my baby that had this horrible disease. i try very hard to look for something to be thankful for with these bouts with cancer....it makes me feel guilty though to say i'm glad it isn't drew that is sick because i would never wish mam to be sick either. i suppose that's what i'm thankful for though, that it isn't drew that is sick. i feel like that's a really sucky thing to be thankful for....

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

Hebrews 11:1

(((((((((((((((((( f r i d a y ))))))))))))))))))))

2009-01-23T19:15:00.003-05:00

it was a gorgeous day today, great for running. we did 4 miles today and with the weather being so nice it made it much easier. this will be a short one, just a few things i'm thankful for.

>warmer weather

>the fact that i only had bus duty 3 days this week

>good friends to work with

>y-ties.....my kids will not keep their shoes tied

>a husband who cares enough to notice i left my wedding rings at home today and called 3 minutes after i left home to see why....(my hands were dry so i took them off last night to put lotion on - my hands were swelled this morning and my band wouldn't go on. hey, i was in a hurry!)

>a happy, healthy baby (see pictures above...lol)

>a site called stumbleupon....it can keep me occupied for a while

>i finally found a way to send josh videos of drew

>it's friday!

also, thanks to brittany, i've finally found a fantastic website with blogger backgrounds. It is sssoooo much easier than the old way i've been doing it and these templates are so pretty. i've changed mine a few times already because i keep coming across ones i like more than the last. i've settled on a valentine's theme for now....it will have to change soon enough.

check out the site....angie, i know you'll love it!

The Cutest Blog on the Block

back to the grind tomorrow

2009-01-19T18:37:00.002-05:00

vacation's over, we're back to work tomorrow. when i was thinking about it, i couldn't help but be just a little excited, though. we've been stuck in the house for about 5 days now and i've been a little stir crazy.
drew and i took a drive today but thursday and friday it was just too cold to take him out, even if we weren't getting out of the car. what if we got a flat tire and then had to sit in the cold??? too much worrying, i know.
today was a tough one. drew has had a major temper today and i've had about enough of the screaming, dog chasing, dogs chasing the poor cat and drew getting in the cabinets (and yes, these are the ones that have locks on them, i don't know how he does it!). i'm sure by tomorrow at noon i'll be wishing i was home again. i love staying with him but when he gets in a mood, watch out. he's wanted me to hold him all day...probably because he's got a runny nose and just doesn't feel great. however, i haven't felt much better today and i'm exhausted from all the up and down, playing in the floor, then having to run and get ruby out of something. on top of all that, i haven't gotten to run since last wednesday. it was too cold thursday and friday and i've just been lazy over the weekend. i feel guilty with the treadmill here but when i get a chance and drew takes a nap, i've always got something else that i need to do....laundry, clean the kitchen, etc. etc.
i really have enjoyed my impromptu break though i wish it hadn't accummulated us two snow days. we've got a pool to put to use this summer and i don't want the summer days to be cut into! :) i'm ready for the snow and cold to be over, too. i don't like it in the first place and i'm especially tired of it after the last week. on a brighter note, i have duty this week and it's only a four day week. i don't think i've had a 4 day week of bus duty in several years, so hooray!

snow day #2

2009-01-15T08:16:00.005-05:00

jeanne has said all week we would have a snow day thursday....her reasoning was that she had a dentist appt this morning and would have to get up and get ready anyway, so that's the day we would get one of our few days off. unfortunately jeanne wasn't the only one that had to get up and get ready....i was halfway to work getting ready to drop drew off before i got a call saying school was closed. i was not a happy camper. i mean come on, some of us live a little farther out and have to leave earlier to drive to work. not everyone can leave the house at 7:00 and still make it! i wouldn't really have minded had it just been me, but i hate having to wake him up for nothing. drew and i usually leave around 6:20-6:30 and i expected if we weren't having school, it would already be closed....not so much. i hope the poor babies that ride buses weren't out waiting, too. it was too stinking cold!

though i'm complaining about having to get out anyway, i am thankful i can spend the day at home with drew and that many of us get a much needed day of rest. tim's mom and dad got him a subscription to netflix for the rest of the winter months and i've got a movie with my name on it downstairs. i've been waiting forever to see it so i'm hoping i can watch it between drew's nap and washing clothes.

drew is thoroughly enjoying his day home....he's become obsessed with the broom and is really getting ticked when he tries to go through a dorrway and can't fit through because he has the broom turned the wrong way. i know it's horrible of me, but i can't help but laugh when he screams about it. i do have to teach him problem solving skills, right? besides, i'll get my payback because at the moment he's under the kitchen table.....we all know what that means--diaper duty.

ruby and waylon are loving us being home, too. i think they're very excited they don't have to stay in the garage all day. the best part about the snow day.......tomorrow's friday. :)

having a meltdown because the broom is stuck between the highchair and table....

so much snow i can't get out the front door.

RUBY trying to look innocent
WAYLON, who really is innocent

again with the sweeping....he's been at it almost an hour.

hellooooo?

2009-01-07T21:34:00.003-05:00

okay, i'm beginning to get a little ticked that no one else is blogging lately. have you all forgotten that i am a voyeur and need insight into your lives? (even though i see most of you daily.) i need my fix!

tommy, i'm so glad you are posting. i especially loved the cinnamon challenge. that was the best i've seen in a while. it makes it so much more fun to watch someone on youtube when you actually know them. kudos to you.

jennifer, school has not started yet. you do not have the excuse of having to do work for methods right now. FOCUS, please. it's not like you don't have time to blog while you are at work, work or work. or cooking supper for your family. haven't you taught those kids to cook for you yet?

angie, you get a bye for now. :) i'm being nice. you better enjoy it, it won't last long. well, i take that back, you don't get on my nerves so i can continue to be nice to you...i even bought you graham crackers tonight. i'm really trying to stoke my maternal side and nurse you back to good health.

SAS. what can i say....? i have heard nothing about stad in over a week. not even a good traveling story. i'm going through smith withdrawals. (though i really enjoyed the facebook picture of you all on the way to check out the lights at christmas. stad's face was priceless. that would definitely go on gig's wall of shame.)

okay, i've blown off some steam. wait, one more -- rue, you need to blog. period. keep me updated on wedding stuff. and, as always, i would enjoy more DUI photos.

please come to denver with the snowfall

2008-12-30T11:36:00.003-05:00

okay jennifer, here's your chance to name that tune...;)

josh and rue loaded up and took off for denver sunday morning. we went home to see them before they left but didn't make it. i wasn't sure what time they were leaving but we wouldn't have made it anyway, mom said they left around 6:00. they got there last night around 12:30 our time i think, safe and sound. from the message josh sent me last night, the trip was beautiful with only one road block -- rue left her phone in topeka at the motel! hopefully she will get it back.

josh starts school next week. they are spending some time with his good friend dayton and his family right now. it's good to know he'll have someone he knows close while he's getting used to the city. hopefully we can visit before they leave denver, i've wanted to go there since his first trip a few years ago. the pictures were gorgeous.

on another note, i signed up for my first half marathon yesterday. the deadline for registration was getting closer and i couldn't put it off any longer. when i hit submit, i thought i would be sick...it's just one of those things you think you can't do until you actually do it. there's gonna have to be a trip back to the ol' doc before april because with that crowd of people, i'm sure to have a major meltdown. ;) keep your fingers crossed that i can stay healthy and injury free, this is something i am really looking forward to accomplishing. i will be recruiting running buddies to help me along the way so if you see me coming, you may want to have an excuse ready. wait, i forgot, i don't take excuses...that's for you jennifer, ha!

Our siblings push buttons that cast us in roles we felt sure we had let go of long ago - the baby, the peacekeeper, the caretaker, the avoider.... It doesn't seem to matter how much time has elapsed or how far we've traveled. ~Jane Mersky Leder

Merry Christmas to All, and to All a Good Night!

2008-12-25T18:54:00.005-05:00

chillin' after breakfast. look at that belly!

hayley and budge. he insisted these were not pajamas.

gigmaw, drew, kate and josh.
josh is feeding him ice cream and he's loving it

i'm posting pictures -- we are one tired crew. we hope everyone had a very blessed and safe christmas. we had a wonderful christmas eve and day and were so glad to celebrate with family and friends. drew so enjoyed his day and is completely exhausted but not willing to give up the staying awake fight just yet....

he got wayyyy too much stuff! :)

traditions

2008-12-24T19:21:00.003-05:00

many families hold many different traditions on christmas eve. my family has always gotten together on christmas eve at gig's house. we usually open one small present and save the rest for christmas morning. i didn't get to go home for christmas eve last year or this year. we have spent the last few years with tim's family, eating, talking and enjoying each other's company. i guess when you have a baby it makes it much harder to travel, especially when he has an early bedtime. when you begin a family of your own, you begin to make small changes in your old traditions to start traditions that are unique to your household.
tomorrow morning we will get up early, let drew open his presents, head to bob and kathy's again for more present opening, then be on our way to beattyville. i love that tim has a great family close so we can share the holidays with them. i am a little nostalgic for home though, i don't think that will ever change. so many years of waking up on christmas morning with a full house makes it really hard to adjust to new traditions. i hope we can make drew's memories as sweet as all those tim and i both have from our christmas holidays. i'll post pictures tomorrow of all our christmas eve/day gatherings.
in the meantime, here are some christmas eve facts:

first, we have the santa tracker: http://www.noradsanta.org/en/home.html

next, we have our facts about the celebrations in some churches. i had to put this one on here because it made me remember a time when i went to midnight mass with mamaw. i had gone the year before by myself because i was asked to sing in a choir for the service. this was not at my church but at the episcopal church. (we have very similar beliefs/traditions and this is where my best friend went to church.) anyway, a few things are different in their ceremonies....namely the end of many ceremonies they say peace to one another. having never witnessed this, i thought everyone was saying "pleased to meet you" therefore when all the attendees turned to me to shake my hand, i said "pleased to meet you" to everyone. no one even told me what i was doing wrong until i shook the hand of my high school librarian (who was such a good friend to sarah and i--definitely our confidante) and she laughed hysterically at me. she informed me of my mistake and told me i was supposed to say "peace be with you". yes, it makes much more sense but i had no idea....i giggle everytime this happens in a service now and i always think of that midnight mass. :)

The Christmas season liturgically begins on Christmas Eve, and is preceded by a four-week anticipatory and penitential period called Advent, which can include acts of almsgiving, fasting, and service while the season unfolds. The Mass of the Vigil is said in the late afternoon or early evening hours of December 25th. The Christmastide season continues through until the Feast of the Baptism of the Lord on the Sunday following the Solemnity of the Epiphany.
Many Roman Catholics and Anglicans traditionally celebrate a midnight Mass (Eucharist) which begins sometime before midnight on Christmas Day; this ceremony, which is held in churches throughout the world, marks the beginning of Christmas Day. A popular joke is to ask what time Midnight Mass starts, but in recent years some churches have scheduled their "Midnight" Mass as early as 7 p.m. In Spanish-speaking areas, the Midnight Mass is sometimes referred to as Misa del Gallo ("Rooster's Mass"). In the Philippines, this custom lasts for nine days, starting on December 16 and continuing daily up to December 24, during which Filipinos attend dawn masses, usually starting at around 4:00-5:00 a.m.
Lutheran parishes often carry on Christmas Eve traditions typical for Germany and Scandinavia. "Krippenspiele" (nativity plays), special festive music for organ, vocal and brass choirs and candlelight services make Christmas Eve one of the highlights in the Lutheran Church calendar. Christmas Vespers are popular in the early evening, and midnight services are also widespread in regions which are predominately Lutheran. The old Lutheran tradition of a Christmas Vigil in the early morning hours of the 25th of December (Christmette) can still be found in some regions of Germany. In eastern and middle Germany many congregations still continue the tradition of "Quempas singing": separate groups dispersed in various parts of the church sing verses of the song "He whom Shepherds once came Praising" (Quem pastores) responsively.
Methodists celebrate the evening in different ways. Some, in the early evening, come to their church to celebrate Holy Communion with their families. The mood is very solemn, and often the only visible light is the Advent Wreath, and the candles upon the Lord's Table. Others celebrate the evening with services of light, which often include singing the song "Silent Night" as a variety of candles (including personal candles) are lit. Other churches have late evening services at 11 pm, so that the church can celebate Christmas Day together with the ringing of bells at 12 am. Others offer Christmas Day services as well. Each church is welcome to celebrate Christmas Eve evening and Christmas Day in their own special way.
The Nine Lessons and Carols broadcast annually from King's College, Cambridge on Christmas Eve has established itself as one of the signs that Christmas has begun in the United Kingdom. It is broadcast to many parts of the world via the BBC World Service.
Other churches also hold a candlelight service, which is also typically held earlier in the evening; these often feature dramatizations of the Nativity. Similar worship services are held in many Protestant churches on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day.

christmas eve eve

2008-12-23T19:41:00.002-05:00

oh, tomorrow is one of my very favorite days of the year! i think i've always loved christmas eve more than christmas day....maybe it's the anticipation, i'm not sure. i am so excited to see drew with all his presents christmas morning i can't stand it. we'll have to keep up our tradition and let him open one small gift on christmas eve. i'm hoping since his birthday he will know about unwrapping presents a little better come christmas morning.
he is starting to talk like crazy, i can't believe all the babbling he's doing. today i was showing him a book with animals, pointing to them and naming them as we went through. when i got to the fish, i said it then he repeated "shish". i love it! he points at it now and says "sh, sh". his grandpa is going to flip when he hears it....maybe that will be his christmas present from drew!
be safe in your travels tomorrow if you're out and about. i have a feeling tim's going to have me out doing a few last minute deals. :)

two dimes, two pennies

2008-12-22T19:12:00.002-05:00

mom and hayley came down and we braved the cold for some shopping. we met tim in lexington and returned a few things while also getting a good deal on mom's new christmas present. i have never been able to keep presents for mom, that's why i try not to buy them until the last minute. today was no different. tim and i got away with buying her gift without being found out while in the store, but before we even got out of the store we had given it to her. it was a camera....she needs to know how to use it before the christmas gathering, right?

drew was such a good little shopper again today. tim and i cracked up in target because he was getting sleepy....something about target makes him want a nap. trying to do everything to please him, i handed him his stuffed elephant and he promptly reared back and launched it as far as it would go. i was about three feet ahead of tim and drew, pushing the buggy, when i see a gray streak fly by my ear and land in the buggy. i was a little shocked, then i said, "that's my boy!" he does need a good arm for those future sporting events....

21**

2008-12-21T19:03:00.003-05:00

we were able to get a little last minute shopping done today. we are going to go back out in the frigid weather tomorrow to get the rest of it done. though drew was an absolute trooper today, he started getting very tired and we had to call it quits in order to get home for a nap. he is so funny in all the stores....when he sees someone coming down an aisle, he just laughs and smiles, waving at them. he's a very happy boy.
drew had also started saying "thank you" when we hand him something. i guess he's picking up different things we say lately. everytime i hand him something i'll say please before i give it to him and thank you after. it sounds a little more like "tink to" but hey, i know what he's trying to say. :) when tim realized what he'd said today he said, "wow, wouldn't it be nice if we raised a little boy with good manners?" i just looked at him, a little stunned and said "do you honestly think he's going to be allowed to be anything other than polite and mannerly?" i guess i just never thought of it as being an option. now i'm having these thoughts where we raise this rude, impolite little boy!
since we didn't finish our last minute shopping today, we'll go back out tomorrow. i'll have drew so bundle up he's probably going to be sweating. wish us luck!

twenty - let the festivities begin

2008-12-20T20:58:00.002-05:00

today is the 20th and we have officially begun the christmas festivities. school's out, the cold weather was back and we had the first holiday gathering. we left this morning for tim's aunt's house in oh. the day could be summed up in a few words: overeating, family, laughter, noise and fun. we hadn't seen everyone in a few months so it was nice to see them again. one of tim's cousins had a baby girl, karaline, a few months after drew was born. it was so cute to see how much she'd grown since we saw her in july. she and drew hit it off quick.
drew, as always, made himself the center of attention whenever possible. he is such a ham. lots of good pictures were taken, though i once again left my camera in the car....i'll have to post some once i get them emailed to me.
five days until christmas....this is one of my favorite times of the year!

19th: day of freedom

2008-12-19T20:56:00.002-05:00

today was the last day of school before christmas break. it seems like it flew by and we had so much to do....luckily we got most of it done yesterday. we had a great day, it was fun and everyone was happy for once.
first we had christmas breakfast which was a blast. next, we had AR store, then we were off to the christmas play. after that activity, then lunch, the computer lab for math....finally it was time for stockings and stocking stuffers. we had planned to do it in the morning and get it all over with but the morning was jam-packed and we had no time. after being asked 44,000 times by 19 kids when we were going to do it, we finally got it over with. jennifer and i stayed in the back of the room handing kids their stuffers to hand out. the funny part is that we both had our empty gift bags full of stuffers by the end of the sharing session. two grown women, who have eaten for the last two weeks like it's the last supper, (well, i have, sorry if that offends you jenn), and here we are collecting candy canes, double bubble, mad libs books, heart shaped sunglasses and huge bling-bling rings. from the dollar store...it was definitely a kodak moment. too bad we didn't get a picture. my glasses ended up making me a little sick. you know when the plastic isn't really plastic and it makes everything look kind of wavy? it makes me very carsick but i couldn't take them off because they were all watching, making sure i was as fashionable as third graders thought i should be.
i got so many nice, thoughtful gifts. it always amazes me how the boys are so in tune with what i like...sometimes you think they aren't listening, but they really are. some of my favorites today were my new nike backpack and headbands (thank you emory, jennifer and i made use of them on our run after school), the dog photo frame, ornament and magnet from jacob, BEERCHEESE from alex and abby, huge, fluffy slipper socks from destiny, good smelly lotions, all the chocolate, my waco loopers ornament, a bybee pottery platter and several more gifts. my kids and their families have been so generous and thoughtful this year. it made me so happy to see them want to give to their classmates, their teachers and our little boy we sponsored from ripples of hope.
now, i think i need to go lay down and let all this food digest before we hit it to ohio for tim's family christmas tomorrow. i'm going to be ten pounds heavier before the weekend's over!

9 x 2 = 18

2008-12-18T19:08:00.005-05:00

yeah, yeah, i've got multiplication on the brain....the kids are having meltdowns over their multiplication quiz while i'm wondering if they're ever gonna memorize these facts. i don't care what the experts say, you have to memorize multiplication facts, no matter how many strategies you have to figure them out, it just works better that way.

one more day until christmas break! it's amazing to me how wild things can get around christmas...i think my head was spinning today. i wrapped about 25 presents before 9:30 while teaching reading and a writing lesson. i ended up having to let my kids help me wrap some of the gifts....i should have taken pictures of their wrapping jobs. then again, they weren't that much worse than mine. :)

i can't remember if i've already mentioned it, but i did not put ornaments on our tree this year. most of mine are old ones mom and tim's mom gave me from when we were both little. lots of mine are paper or felt ones that we made when we were 3 or 4. since we have drew walking now and ruby reeking havoc wherever she goes, i decided it was probably best that we didn't put them on until things settle down a little. if ruby were to eat one of my old ornaments, i might lose it on her. i kept thinking maybe i would end up feeling guilty and get them out. tonight however, i realized i had made a very wise decision. as i was crawling after drew while he was wildly punching buttons on the remote and running, yes running, across the living room ruby gets in my face crunching on something. after i ran my hand down her throat to retrieve the object, i was not surprised to find a christmas light in my hand. i thought well, at least i can replace a single bulb. yes, you could do that if your dog politely chewed only the bulb off. you cannot replace it if she chews the entire wire and bulb off.

as i went to search and see which bulb she got, i promptly jerked my hand back after getting shocked. even though the whole row of lights on the bottom of our prelit tree was dark, the wire was still live. it can't be replaced. how do you restring a prelit tree? oh, well. i just unplugged it, so not to get shocked for the third time, (because once wasn't enough for me to touch the wire, i had to check again to make sure i really did get shocked the first time like a dummy), and bent/wrapped/hid the live wire up under one of the branches.

mom swears she is marley, the yellow lab from the book marley and me. i refuse to read the adult book because i have a feeling what happens to the dog in the end....i'm reading the kid's version of john grogan's book to my kids right now and they love it. maybe ruby is like marley....i still can't help but love her. she is my special dog. :)

she adores drew. maybe because he's always giving her food....

i can't believe how much she's grown since august!

this is the most recent. they were exhausted from playing so hard and when i looked down, this is how they were laying.

advent seventeen

2008-12-17T19:04:00.002-05:00

17 days down, woo-hoo!

today, it's songs. christmas songs. some of them i love, some i can't stand....i have to say thank you to kate and hayley for always making sure i have to hear that one song i can't stand yet i'll sing it all day long -- paul mccartney's simply having a wonderful christmastime. i cannot stand that song!

songs i love:

blue christmas - only elvis
o holy night
hark the herald angels sing
silent night
angels we have heard on high
noel
away in a manger
baby its cold (the bing crosby/doris day version)
do you hear what i hear - i will forever picture mrs. eversole when i hear this
emmanuel
any charlie brown christmas music
christmas canon rock - always reminds me of sarah....
carol of the bells
we three kings
joy to the world - oh, eloise trying to out sing mrs. eversole....great memories
and the angels cried

i guess i just love church at christmas and i always loved the music....when the lights were turned out and nothing but candles were giving off light, what a warm feeling. i insisted that drew be baptized at church last christmas even though he was only about 4 weeks old. tim was baptized along with him and i was so happy we could do that at christmas. it's always seemed so special and especially so since drew's formal acceptance into the church, where tim and i pledged to always care for him and teach him the way to be a good person, a good christian, was at christmas.

okay, mushy stuff aside, here are some of the not-so-favorites:

of course, simply having a wonderful christmastime
hard candy christmas
deck the halls
where are you christmas
my grown up christmas list
we wish you a merry christmas
let it snow
santa baby

i'm not sure why i don't like these, i just don't care for them very much.
i used to really not like the little drummer boy but since our kids at school sing it for their program nearly every year, i have come to love it. i crack up every time they sing "pa-rrrrrum pum pum pum". everytime they get a little louder until they're basically yelling at the end. hilarious.

i started thinking about songs because we've been listening to christmas music in my room the last few weeks. i've been a little peeved at one of my kids because he keeps telling my other kids santa is not real. he continues to do this even after i've given him "the look". we've had a talk and he still refuses to believe santa is real. that stinks for a kid that age to not believe but it's even worse that they will tell their classmates and send everyone into a frenzy. i tell them over and over, you have to believe to receive. i still believe...there were many christmas's when we would have gotten very little had there not been a little santa somewhere to help mom and dad out. santa comes in many forms....like i told the kids, santa is like jesus - you can't see him, but you better believe in him.

aDVeNT DaY SiXTeeN

2008-12-16T19:44:00.004-05:00

advent day sixteen was welcomed with a SNOW DAY! it's rare we get one, especially before christmas break. i enjoyed being able to sleep in a little but i really didn't want to miss school. the more we miss, the longer into the summer it drags on.
i used to love calvin and hobbes cartoons....here are a few to go with our first snow day. i had to insert them as links because they wouldn't fit as pictures....:)

http://bbs.wiredminds.org/images/user_files/421b39e442220a229f04a.gif

http://sajwan.files.wordpress.com/2008/04/calvin_and_hobbes-snow_brain_kill.jpg

http://www.fredscorner.nl/calvin/snow/snow-fredscorner-24.gif

http://sajwan.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/calvin_and_hobbes-snow_ball.jpg

happy birthday, jeanne and other randomness

2008-12-15T18:33:00.003-05:00

today was officially jeanne's birthday though we kind of celebrated last week. it's a good thing, too because she ended up going home sick. i barely even got to mouth a quick happy birthday to her this morning and i saw her no more the entire day.
school was a little crazy today....everyone's schedule's are so mixed up this time of year. christmas store, potlucks, sickness, and talk of bad weather just fuel the fire. if we get snow tonight and school is called off, i'll....i'll....well, i'll believe it when it happens. let's just say i'll be laying my clothes out tonight and getting drew's things ready just like every other night. i hate breaking routine.
i haven't blessed you with any randomness lately and i've been thinking:

why has my baby decided he needs to carry around a dust pan and broom everywhere he goes lately?
will i always call him my baby, even when he's 50 years old. (i already know the answer to that one....of course.)
don't you wish when you hit that "next blog" button at the top of the blogger page, and you get to a really cool looking blog, everything wasn't in flippin' japanese? tonight i came across and arabic one with lots of pictures....it's kind of like when you're getting your nails done and all the people working there are jabbering up a storm. you just know they're talking about you. total paranoia.
will ruby ever settle down?
why does drew always have to poop after i've given him a bath and wrestled him into a diaper and sleeper? no matter how long we wait!
why, when drew does fill his britches, does he go under the kitchen table to do it? such an odd place to choose for privacy...
do i have whooping cough? in the middle of the night, i've succeeded in convincing myself it's true.
why is night always a time for thoughts to creep out and make you think you're crazy?
will my buddy get to feeling better soon? it stinks knowing they feel like you-know-what and i feel helpless.
will i ever find a gift for uncle jon? should i just go for cigarettes and beer and call it a gift?
will the weatherman finally be right? you know, we teach our kids a prediction is an educated guess or estimation....do they need a refresher?
what will i do when i've finished my last twilight book?
is waylon really a dog or should i start researching reincarnation a little more? sometimes, i think he's human.
should i whack that kid tomorrow that keeps telling the other kids there's no santa? he told my kids santa was dead. DEAD! i promptly told him santa was like jesus, he would always be there. either i get points deducted from the hell ticket, or i get them added on for making a slight comparison of santa and baby jesus. i really think i'll get points deducted because that really made my kids happy. they now think santa and jesus are either related or just best buds....
can i get fired for the jesus/santa talk? ah, i'll just say i was teaching them about similes.

You'll shoot your eye out kid!

2008-12-14T20:26:00.005-05:00

here are the promised pictures....and boy are they flattering! the pic above was one taken before the race. we were freezing. it couldn't have been much above 20 degrees and i don't think any of us felt our fingers or toes even after we started running. normally you warm up even in the farthest extremities but not at this one. though we went through a little pain, it was all worth it in the end. again i will say, WE WON!

we paid special attention to detail with our real red ryder bb gun, (thank you shannon and emory), a red bar of soap, fish net stockings and a lamp shade with fringe, a tongue stuck to a pole, a coon skin cap, goggles for flick, a broomstick to make beth's arms stick out like randy's and of course the glasses. through the race we took wrong turns, got tangled up in lights, grabbed treats from the present table, had to stop to remove bunny feet--then stop to put them back on at the end, remove layers of clothing from bobbi, grab a dropped camera, dropped scarf, dropped glasses and bunny ears and avoid many, many children that were about to get taken out by beth's arms -- which she had absolutely no control over. she did very well considering she had a broomstick through her sleeves....she only hit one little girl and one truck. i said "beep-beep" but i guess the little girl didn't hear me in time so she got clipped. well, nailed. nailed, clipped, who's counting?

we had such a good time, we are already planning for next year. :)

randy (beth), farkas (bobbi), the pink nightmare (me), santa (pam), mom (julie) ralphie (marie) leg lamp (jennifer) and of course flick (jeanne)

coming down the homestretch....beth looks like she has bunny ears.

jeanne with her tongue stuck to the pole.

who said "i triple dog dare you"?

notice the lady beside her staring...we got that same look all morning from everyone we passed.

almost done!

pam looks like she's not sure if she wants to eat the banana or the gun.

thank you for this flattering picture, tyler. i truly appreciate it.

thirteen

2008-12-13T19:13:00.004-05:00

i promised pictures, i don't have them yet....sorry! the reindeer ramble was a success, we won first place in the santapede team division! jennifer's friend tyler was our photographer today and he's going to send me the pictures soon.

to prepare you, we went as the christmas story characters and it was fantastic. included in our team were: the pink nightmare, ralphie in regular clothes, the bully, randy, mom, the leg lamp, santa with the red ryder bb gun (and yes, we had a real red ryder), farkas (the bully) and of course, flick. to hold you over until pictures are posted, here is some christmas story trivia for you to enjoy.

oh, and if you've never seen it, shame on you.

According to Peter Billingsley (young Ralphie) in the DVD Commentary, the nonsensical ramblings that Ralphie exclaims while beating up Scott Farkus were scripted, word for word.

For the scene in which Flick's tongue sticks to the flagpole, a hidden suction tube was used to safely create the illusion that his tongue had frozen to the metal.

Ralphie says that he wanted the "Red Ryder BB Gun" 28 times.

The film was released just before Thanksgiving and became a surprise hit. By the time Christmas rolled around, the movie had already been pulled from most theaters because it had been "played out". After complaints were lodged at the theater owners and the studio, the film played on select screens until after the first of the year 1984.

Inspired the creation of "The Wonder Years" (1988).

Director Bob Clark mentions in the commentary on the 2003 DVD that he worked with writer Jean Shepherd for nearly ten years on the concept of ‘A Christmas Story’ before the film was made.

12-12 yo

2008-12-12T19:13:00.002-05:00

okay, tomorrow is the big day. it's the reindeer ramble and we have entered as a "santapede" team. we're prepared, we're all currently or have recently been sick, and it's gonna be c-o-l-d. sounds like a great way to spend a wintery saturday morning!

i am not going to give away any more details to those of you who don't know what the reindeer ramble is yet...you'll have to come back and check out the blog pictures tomorrow. :)

day 11 - mixed blessings

2008-12-11T20:18:00.004-05:00

this morning started off a little sad....a rainy morning matched the phone call i got at 6:45.
first, i never get phone calls, especially that early in the morning so i immediately knew something was wrong. it was mamaw calling to tell me aunt sister had passed away in the night. her birthday was just last week...
my mamaw is the youngest of 10 children and her sister, ruth, was the oldest. you can imagine how much like a mom she was to mamaw. she was even her teacher while mam was in school. all the siblings called her sister as well as calling their oldest brother, brother. i guess it stuck because that's all they have ever been known as. i guess it sounds odd to other people when they hear us say "aunt sister" and "uncle brother" but it was never odd for me.
aunt sister and i used to write letters to one another every week. they'd be pages long sometimes. i think i started doing this because she always wrote mam letters and i would see them laying on the mantle. one day i decided i wanted to write her as well, so i got the address off one of the letters and sent my letter out later that day. i can't even remember how old i was -- maybe middle school? anyway, we kept up with the correspondence for years, all the way up to my college years. at that point, she was getting a bit forgetful and would write the same things or lose the letter she'd started, find it a few days later and start writing on it again. i loved getting those letters in the mail. i have a very wide sentimental streak so i saved all the letters she sent me. i have them tied with a ribbon on the table in drew's room and just had them out looking at them a few days ago. they made me smile still....i guess they did their job. :)
i know this isn't a christmas theme today, but she was a blessing to mamaw, to big mom and to me. i think i am very much like one of her daughters, sissy, and i've always loved that. she lived a difficult life at times and i'm sure she's in a better place now.
on the way to work when i got off the phone with mam, i couldn't help but cry a little...just nostalgia i suppose. i also thought of how fitting it was that though she passed, another little life will come into this world in her place. i am sure she would be thrilled to know her place in this world would be filled by a sweet child....sometimes, that's what makes the loss of a loved one okay, the fact that another will get the chance to enjoy the sweetness of that new life.

Hope is the thing with feathers

That perches in the soul,

And sings the tune without the words,

And never stops at all,

And sweetest in the gale is heard;

And sore must be the storm

That could abash the little bird

That kept so many warm.

I've heard it in the chillest land,

And on the strangest sea;

Yet, never, in extremity,

It asked a crumb of me.

- Emily Dickinson

T^e^N

2008-12-10T18:57:00.003-05:00

ever changing,

ever flowing,

the Christmas spirit

is ever glowing.

blessings among us,

blessings abound,

every year changes

still blessings are around.

too many troubles,

too much stress,

what happened to family,

remembering and rest?

the wind gets colder,

the wind begins to whip,

it's nothing compared

to that one long trip.

we have much to be thankful,

we have much to rejoice,

for we were blessed

with an everlasting voice.

seasons will come,

seasons will go,

one constant remains --

He has told us so.

NiNe

2008-12-09T18:47:00.003-05:00

this is harder than i thought.....what was i thinking, 25 blogs in 25 days???
i just found my bestest bud SAS has started her own blog...i'm so excited. and yes sarah, i can now stalk you as well. Ha, ha.
sarah mentioned something on her blog i hadn't even thought to mention lately -- the cold weather. we both hate it but i can't believe i haven't really noticed it so far this year. i think since i'm running again it's just one of those gotta deal with it kind of things. you bundle up and go out. my absolute favorite part is that people drive by at the point where you've stripped off your long sleeves and notice you running in 30 degree weather with a t-shirt and running tights. i LOVE those crazy looks! it makes me feel superior in some weird way. maybe because i'm doing something they could be doing but won't. i can remember being very upset when i would see others out running in the cold, heat or rain and think "gosh, i want to be doing that!"
gear up girls, it's only gonna get colder. :)

OCHO - sickness

2008-12-08T18:25:00.002-05:00

go ahead and get the medicine ready, some sort of illness is coming for you.

it's bad enough when you have to feel bad and get to stay at home, but it really stinks when you feel bad and have to get up and go somewhere. drew hasn't felt well for a week now. i think maybe i'm starting to come down with something....my whole body hurts. angie is sick, jennifer is sick, 6 kids in angie's room were sent home today (one with strep), one kid got puked on and had to go home and change clothes, more parents sent their kids in sick but didn't think it might be a better idea to keep them home. 'tis the season!

a nice warm bed sounds really good right now....i'm off to get ready for it.

day 7 -- laziness

2008-12-07T16:45:00.003-05:00

day 7 is dedicated to laziness....we've been lazy today, mostly laying around the house trying to stay warm.

drew did not sleep much last night so i didn't get into bed until 3:30 this morning. luckily, he slept late and tim got up and cleaned up the kitchen, cooked breakfast and folded clothes. ahhhh, that was a nice thing to wake up to. after we had a late breakfast, we got ready and headed out to target. drew's clothing supply seems to keep depleting (kind of like the socks in the washer) so he had to have some new clothes. he got two new outfits and he's going to look like such a big boy in them especially since he's walking everywhere these days. i think for christmas i'll get him some big boy tennis shoes, too. we all know how i looovvvveeeee tennis shoes. :)

on a thankful note, our family is very thankful his dad wasn't hurt yesterday. he was headed to ohio and when he got to florence he heard an advisory about the weather and turned around to come back home. he came back home, stopped by their shell station, then headed back home. when he was headed home, a car on a side street couldn't stop because of the icy roads and he nailed her going about 55 mph. he has a few cuts -- a busted lip and cut/bruised nose and some cuts on his hands but otherwise okay. we expected him to get up and be very sore today but he said he felt pretty good except for his thumbs being jammed and sore. too bad he can't say the same for his truck....it is evidently beyond repair. the girl that hit him had to be taken to the hospital so we hope she's okay today as well. this was his second wreck in two days! the day before, someone ran him off the road and into a guard rail on his way to work. he definitely had someone looking out for him the last few days. :)

SiX

2008-12-06T20:00:00.004-05:00

today was shopping day and i think i've gotten most of mine taken care of.

i don't know if the parade last night kept everyone from coming back out today or if everyone is going to lexington to shop but there wasn't the big crowd i'd expected, thank goodness.

we ate then shopped....i got all my stuff taken care of for my ripples of hope child and i think that really made my day. (i got my uncle's present taken care of as well since i drew his name for christmas.) ripples is a nonprofit organization my friend kelly's husband co-founded. they provide thanksgiving baskets, christmas gifts, backpacks and an easter delivery for kids in the community in need. we are also sponsoring a child for my class at school instead of doing gift exchanges this year. sometimes i think our kids really don't understand how much they're blessed with. drew has more than he needs and i know we all see kids everyday who don't and probably won't even get what they need to make it -- food, clothes, a coat, shoes.

i know lots of people think it may not be a good idea in this day and time to buy items and give them to kids because their parents will most likely take them and resell or trade it for money, cigarettes, drugs, etc. however, when i see that a 4 year old child does not have a coat or shoes, i know they can't help that their parents are crappy. and sometimes, these kids have parents that do try and just can't make it. either way, it makes me feel good to know that i can possibly make some kid's christmas a little happier because they get a toy or new clothes. my girl was a 13 year old and she'll be getting all the girly stuff a teenager needs...i hope she enjoys. :)

day 5 -- i'm tired, it's short

2008-12-05T21:11:00.002-05:00

this would be christmas in my house now....

church christmas parties

2008-12-04T18:51:00.004-05:00

it's always an odd thing to grow up in eastern kentucky and not go to either the baptist church, christian church or some sort of holiness/pentecostal establishment. being that most people are members of the former, there are not too many of us presbyterians (or episcopalians...that's for you SAS). i've heard the denomination referred to as "the frozen chosen" because we don't do all that hand clapping, hallelujah stuff. unfortunately, if they had ever been to one of the church christmas parties the old broads host for our women members, they may think differently of us.

let's just start off by saying mamaw is involved. most of you know mamaw has her golf day on tuesdays and in the winter it's card day. mam likes to take advantage of the ladies and many of them go to our church. when the party comes around every year, mam always takes the reins on the auction. (kind of like the gift exchange thing only we auction items and the money goes to the women's group to use for church related things.) mamaw can be a force to be reckoned with on occasion and these parties seem to bring out the best in her.

as the auctioneer, mamaw is usually busy with the talking and items while mom, gig, hayley, kate and sometimes aunt cheryl and i all sit in a corner (or mam puts us to work showing off the items like bob barker's girls) and make fun of the old ladies. two major happenings stand out in my mind from many years of these parties. the first one comes from a year when us girls were all making fun of a very elderly lady. i know, we probably earned a coupon to hell for doing that at a church function....in our defense, she really did look like george washington. her hair was perfect. anyway, we all got the giggles -- you know, the kind you just can't stop and the harder you try, the harder you laugh? so we're sitting there laughing at her beauty when all the sudden, she gets choked on her third plate of ham. really, seriously, hold your hands around your throat choked. since we were all making fun of her, we happened to be paying attention to what she was doing and not to the auction. maybe that was a blessing in disguise because we all jumped up and tried to help her. it really put a hold on the auction festivities....for maybe two minutes. money making must go on you know. she finally recovered on her own, (thank you jesus!) and i was so very happy....i thought for sure i was going to have to actually put my heimlech skills to use or worse, that cpr certification i'd just gotten. all i could think was "i wonder if her teeth are wooden like george washington?" as i stood there stunned. wouldn't it really stink if you made it all the way to ninety something years old and then die from choking on honey-baked ham? at least she would've gone out happy....everyone knows honey-baked ham can make any time a happy time.

now for memory number two. to some of you that don't know mrs. eversole, this will not make sense....you just have to know the relationship she and mamaw have had all these years. they love each other but sometimes they really get on each other's nerves. again, this story begins with mamaw being the auctioneer at the party, trying her best to sell a pillow (who brings a flippin' monogrammed pillow to an auction???) and was having no luck. only one person's name began with the letter on the pillow and that was the person that brought the gift...uh, can you say recycled? anyway, mrs. eversole wanted to see the pillow better and mamaw, beginning to get ticked that no one would bid, threw it across the church dining room at her, knocking over her cup of coffee on its way. the coffee went all over mrs. eversole and though it had cooled quite a bit, seemed to still be warm. overreaction was in high gear as mrs. eversole promptly stripped her pants off and gave mamaw a scowl that could have sent lucifer back to hell. again, us girls were sitting to the side, making rude, impolite and totally inappropriate comments and were shocked when we saw the lacy, embroidered pillow go flying across the room. (mam is a little like me, it was not a toss, it was definitely a throw.) our eyes went wide then quickly shut as the pants dropped. luckily, forgiveness had to be given (we were in church after all) and things ended up settling back down. the auction went on but it was not one of the better fundraisers.

i believe this year's church party is tomorrow night.....i'm not sure if i'm happy or sad i'll be missing it.

"Quit griping about your church; if it were perfect, you couldn't belong."

~Joseph P. Dooley

# 3 -- socks, cologne and an easy bake oven

2008-12-03T18:13:00.003-05:00

day 3 of ye ol' advent blog is dedicated to those christmas gifts you just didn't understand....
as you can tell from the title and pictures, some of the gifts josh and i received (but didn't really understand) were socks, cologne and an easy bake oven. now, we had many, many christmas mornings when we were surprised and excited. many good gifts were given in the neiderman household. sometimes i don't know how mom and dad did it....4 kids, mom staying home most of the time we were growing up and living off of one income. things were cheaper then but still, they really had to stretch. so, not to sound ungrateful in this entry, i had to get that out of the way.
back to the pictures...i guess when a boy is growing up and hits a certain age, it becomes very difficult to find appropriate gifts. i remember one christmas when it seemed like josh got nothing but tube socks and stetson cologne. bottles and bottles of cologne. did my family think he smelled bad? did they think the 80's scented cologne was a chick magnet? either way, it was way too much of a bad thing. josh is never one to complain so he really took it in stride. he just loaded up his bundle of goods and made his way to his room. we always enjoyed taking all our new goodies to our rooms to arrange and display them so we could look at them for the next few days and continue the enjoyment....i bet if i looked really hard in his room right now, i would be able to find a bottle of cologne left over from over a decade ago.
now for the easy bake oven....i'm sure most little girls would love to have something like this however, i was more of a ball glove, cleats, swishy wind suit kind of girl. i liked tonka trucks and slingshots, army men and tennis shoes. when i opened my big gift from mom, dad and santa one year it was an easy bake oven. honestly, i didn't even know what it was. i had never heard of one of those contraptions. what the heck was i supposed to do with it? mom and dad saw the crestfallen look on my 9 year old face and knew something was wrong. for some reason they thought they overheard me saying sometime before christmas that i wanted one. i have no idea where they got that because i had never heard/seen one in my life. for about a month i don't think i even opened the box....maybe i was a little afraid of it, i'm not sure. anytime you cook a cake with a light bulb things are bound to turn out bad.
one snowy day later when i had exhausted all other options for entertainment (and had probably been banned from all board games at home) i ended up using that easy bake oven. one sixty watt light bulb and tin pan later we had a delicious, rock hard "chocolate" cake. (of which i made everyone sample.) let's just say the oven was shelved after that attempt and i never heard a word about it from the folks. to this day the easy bake oven is my christmas "poke" from family just as josh's cologne and socks are his poke....no one forgets, most of our family have memories like elephants.
i am thankful for all the gifts i received as a kid. i was always a little embarrassed to open my presents because i felt bad people had spent money on me. we were always very blessed with the giving spirit our family possesses. here's what made the good list:

karaoke machine
our dog, nelson
our dog, kris
trampoline (guess they got tired of us doing back flips on the bed!)
rollerskates!
all the tennis shoes i've received over the years
my gorgeous lamp from mom
cameras
cd player
the t.v. josh and i got to share (this caused many fights as we each got to keep it in our room for one week at a time....it was horrible when you would really get into a show and the other person would show up to "repo" the t.v. for their week)
a stereo
bicycles
castle greyskull (or was that josh's birthday?)
my little ponies
my pearls

mom, dad, mam and pap (both hollon and neiderman) always did good....always thinking of others and teaching us to do the same. there are so many less fortunate and i'm sure they would have been ecstatic to open up socks, cologne and an easy bake oven. :)

"Remember, if Christmas isn't found in your heart, you won't find it under a tree."

~ Charlotte Carpenter

# 2

2008-12-02T18:18:00.007-05:00

"The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other."
~Burton Hillis

for day 2 of the advent blog, i've decided to dedicate it to christmas trees. is this really someone's home? i just can't imagine....as of right now, my house sits with toys in the floor, one of waylon's hidden rawhides under part of the couch, a lone sock of drew's at the bottom of the steps, dishes in the sink, the remnants of drew's sweet potato supper on the counter and a few hershey's kisses scattered on the table along with a week's worth of mail. how the heck can i ever have hopes of having such a beautiful tree? it's a good thing i enjoy the chaos (though not the messy house).

now, for today's real advent pictures (which are dedicated to jb, i think he'll enjoy them as much as he did wal-mart bingo):

the beer carton tree

the keg tree

the mountain dew can tree

the mountain dew can tree all done up

now these are what i call real trees. they are such a cultural symbol of where i'm from. i'm so proud they are displayed on the internet for everyone to search, copy and paste. i especially like the keg tree. wonder if they floated them first or if they lugged them up there full?

so, to all you tree lovers, it's too bad we can't do our annual christmas photos in front of one of these dooseys. i only wish i had a picture of my charlie brown tree from last year to add to the mix. i do enjoy a christmas tree very much, no matter what the size, shape, material or theme....love one, love them all.

1 down....

2008-12-01T19:01:00.004-05:00

i have decided that i will post 25 entries to my blog to honor the 25 days before christmas. since i can no longer find advent calendars, this shall be our advent calendar my friends. it will be a daily dose of funny christmas spirit all leading up to the birthday of Jesus. i am sure he will be pleased that i am honoring his birth in such a modern fashion.

i always loooovvvvveeeddddd advent calendars and would get so excited when mom put one up on the fridge. having 4 kids in the house, it took a while to get to our "turn" to open the little door or window covering our number. this was the beginning of many knock-down drag out fights between 4 children arguing over whose turn it was that day....all in the name of our sweet baby Jesus. we probably all deserved coal for that one. well, me anyway. (i can equate the opening of the advent calendar to the games of sorry! that took place in my youth....these games usually ended with me being sent to my room because i could not stand to lose and would throw a horrible fit.) i can't remember if i ever got sent to my room for fighting over the advent calendar...since i remember nearly everything from my days of tantrums, i would say mom must have taken pity on me and not banished me over that one.

for my first advent entry, i have had to change my choice of photo just now.....all because i just found out tommy's faithful dog, wondergirl, died this morning. it almost made me cry. you all know what a dog lover i am, (much to tim's dismay), and i cannot stand it any time something happens to an animal. tommy, i know you loved wondergirl and i am so sorry she died this morning...:(

however, the advent spirit must go on. instead of posting my original choice of photo, (which i will post tomorrow), i have chosen one to honor wondergirl. may she always be the one in doggie heaven to issue the triple dog dare and never the one to accept. here's to you, wondergirl.

Native American Repression Day

2008-11-28T11:44:00.008-05:00

my little turkey

tim, drew and i at keeneland...brrrr!

jeanne and jennifer (who cannot contain her excitement

because jim was going to take her through the krispy kreme drive-thru)

jennifer, jeanne, drew and i post-run

pre-thanksgiving picture

kate, hay, mom, drew, dad

josh, rue, tim and me

uncle tom, uncle jon, gig, aunt cheryl, mam, pap and mom

drew and daisy mae

the newlyweds

rue & josh

gig, aunt cheryl, mom

daisy

the sweetest dog in the world, rosie

okay jennifer, i had to use your new term for the thanksgiving holiday...that was too good to pass up. i have to say, we need to start carrying around a notebook to write down all the crazy things that come out of our mouths--or maybe we should just carry around a video camera to capture all the funny things we see.

now, to our native american repression day celebrations....tim, drew and i got up very early to head to keeneland on thanksgiving morning. i had a 5k i'd signed up for and was very excited about getting up early and standing out in the freezing cold waiting to run on a holiday morning. really, i was excited. tim kept drew in the car where it was warm while i went down to pick up my registration stuff and look for jeanne, jennifer and jim. what is wrong with us that we love to run so much that we will make these sacrifices when most people stay warm and snug in bed and sleep in? oh well, it felt good and we saw several funny things. here is a short list of what we saw:

several men in running tights. i know, it's no worse than a speedo but still. ick!
a map wearing running tights in capri length. i don't know who told him it looked good, but they lied.

a girl wearing bikini bottom short shorts and had her legs lathered up with what looked like a combo of vaseline and baby oil. i'm not sure if that's supposed to keep you warm or what...it's not like you're gonna chafe running a 5k. seriously, put on some pants.
several people being drug by their dogs on the course only to meet back up with them a 1/2 mile down the road where their dog had to make a pit stop....nothing more appetizing than seeing a steaming pile while you're thinking of thanksgiving dinner.
the best running shirt i've seen in a while. it was called the "parson's family project" (a family of runners) with their top 10 list of why they run on the back. waco loopers will have a shirt like this next! :)

i'm thankful i was able to get up and go run yesterday. i'm glad i have good friends that are willing to do it as well, we had fun. now we need to do the reindeer ramble in december.
here are my other thanksgiving "thankfuls":

i have such a happy, healthy family
everyone was at thanksgiving dinner this year!
we are blessed with a home that keeps us safe and warm
my good friends...i don't know what i would do without those few close friends i rely on....tim, angie, sarah, jennifer, jess, jeanne.
a mom who wasn't thrilled that her 28 year old daughter got a tattoo but didn't say anything about it (and still asked to see it.) :)
a new (and only) sister-in-law who loves my brother very much. he needed you in his life and i'm so glad you found each other, even if you did have to go halfway across the world to do it.
my pups. they are my other kids.
a baby who loves me as much as i love him.
a husband who loves me as much as i love him.
a mamaw that has a good enough sense of humor to wear her "my oncologist is my homeboy" shirt i got her when she was still doing chemo.
a family that always seems to have room for one more person at the dinner table, even when we don't know them or it's the first time we've met....you did a good thing, kate.
and i am especially thankful i do not have to go out in the black friday crowd today.....lol.

really?

2008-11-20T19:20:00.004-05:00

sometimes i'm amazed at what comes out of my mouth. not necessarily at the moment, but later when i think back, i think maybe i should have waited before speaking. i think everyone has done that at one time or another....except you, angie. i think you hold your true thoughts in better than anyone i've ever seen. it always amazes me. (especially when i can read that little smile you get on your face that shows what you're really thinking!)
anyway, i digress....when we're talking, i totally understand saying something that maybe didn't come out the right way, was meant differently or just ended up sounding rude. now, the kicker here is that some people put things in writing before actually thinking.
this whole blog stems from the fact that i believe people will put just about anything on the internet without regard for a sense of confidentiality, personal life or the fact that some of us just don't want to know certain things. ever. especially when we get mental images....ugh.
i saw a status update on an old acquaintance's myspace a few minutes ago that said he was "aroused". really? who puts that out there for people to see? i DID NOT want to know that! now i have this nasty mental picture that i can't shake and it really ticks me off.
here are some of the other status updates/posts/survey answers/pictures/whatever else i've come across that tend to annoy or amuse me, depending on the day:

of course, the "aroused" status has to be first. yuck.
a daily status/what are you doing? update by another person on myspace that says "i miss ________ so bad....love u baby. love you more than ever."
people who take pictures of themselves and post them...and you can still see their arm in the picture. hilarious!
people who take their own picture in a mirror. do you think people can't tell you took your own picture???
someone who filled out a survey and instead of answering "yes", "yeah" or "yep" to questions, answers with the word "yelp" everytime. Yelp.
i think it's too funny when people update their status before every single activity in their lives..."going to the store", "going to school", "watching t.v.", "going to bed".....
when people have 75 pictures posted of just themselves....especially the ones that have a caption reading "aren't i cute" or "just me", "just me being silly"...those crack me up.
people who post a million pictures of themselves in skimpy outfits. are they proud, because i can assure them, their relatives are not.
people who label a photo album as "photoshoot in ______" then post pictures of a supposed photoshoot where some of the pictures are taken on a greasy old picnic table. is that supposed to be sexy?

*yes, these are all actual things i have seen on myspace. amazing, huh?

and last, a list of my favorite "mood" selections on myspace....many of which are not moods.

bitchy
blustery
catalyzed
chill
crunk
cultured - i love that you can be crunk yet cultured....
evil
exanimate
exotic
fermented
frisky
froggy
gallant
high
impervious
insubordinant
jedi
knighted
morose
ninja - ninja mood is new to me
obsequious
pensive
pirate
pugnacious - huh? this makes me think of dudley dursley.
pure
quixoted
recumbent
savage
sweaty
vexed
vehement
virginal - before or after being aroused?
voluminous

A First Birthday

2008-11-15T19:56:00.010-05:00

over a year ago, i would receive a daily phone call around 10:00 every morning. for three months i would wait for the call from mam and pap asking if moses was still in his papoose. since my papaw really, truly wanted me to name the baby moses, i laughingly went along with the name when they called.the bedrest thing really had them upset so they had to check (sometimes twice a day) to make sure drew wasn't ready to come. mamaw insisted that i put the police/fire/ambulance service numbers in my phone in case i went into labor at home by myself. what a difference one year can make!

before i had drew i was so sure i would not be a good mom. i was certain i had no idea what to do. what if he got sick? what if he cried all the time? what if my baby was a boy? i didn't know how to take care of a boy!

well, i'm still not sure i'm as good a mom as i can be, i guess time will tell. i know i try my best to be everything drew needs....lately that has been the person who puts him down and steps away when he starts to throw a tantrum. as for my worry that he would get sick, we made 4 trips back to the hospital during drew's first 4 days home because of jaundice. (i know that's not technically "sick" by many standards, but to a new mom, it's sick.) drew did cry for the first 8 weeks nonstop...morning, noon and night. and, to my surprise, he was a boy, ha! i was certain it was going to be a girl....maybe because i wasn't sure what i was supposed to do with a boy. (and how the heck was i supposed to take care of a circumcision?!?!)

luckily, drew is resilient. we've made it almost a year and i am still stunned that we just celebrated my baby's first birthday. to tell the truth, i'm a little sad. i'm happy that i have such a happy, healthy baby, but i'm sad because i just can't believe a whole year has past.

we celebrated drew's birthday today though his birthday is actually the 18th. my family was able to come down and we all ate, opened presents, had cake, took pictures and laughed. drew got a "rock, roll and ride" tricycle from tim and i, books and clothes from mom and dad, clothes from gig and uncle, a car hauler/animal truck from rue and josh, a great uk outfit from abby, push cars from bob and kathy and an awesome time out bench with a parking meter "time-out" timer, (that one was hilarious) from mam and pap. mam also brought him a potty chair for future use....too bad we can't teach ruby to use it too.

we enjoyed our day so much and were so glad our family came out in the nasty, cold weather. :)
pre-party snack

drew & his papaw

drew & his mamaw

drew & momma

drew & aunt rue playing with new toys

on his new time-out bench....only mamaw would give this one!

drew & gigmaw

the cake didn't quite turn out the way i had pictured, ha! betty crocker does not live in this house.

getting ready for cake! all that practice blowing out candles and in the end, he tried to grab it instead of blowing it out....oh, well.

mamaw feeding him more ice cream.

“Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same.”

This weekend's 5K

2008-11-09T10:59:00.004-05:00

part of the crew

the rosencrans'
(drew crashed shortly after this for a 3 hour nap!)

i'm not sure what all the deep conversation is about....

post-race

what's really in that cup???

at the beginning...this was "stomper girl". i could hear her coming a 1/2 mile back because she stomped when she ran. :)

drew and daddy

wow, the morning was fabulous for our run yesterday. i was worried it was going to be cold and rainy but it ended up being a beautiful, sunny fall morning. the run was great and we were already making plans to do it again next year.

we also received some great prizes. my favorite has probably been my new mug made by a local potter for the run. tim has already said how much he likes it about 14 times....i guess i'll have to let him use it, too. :)

thank goodness tim was able to come and watch drew while i ran. he's a lifesaver and such a good daddy. he's always willing to help with drew -- even the dirty jobs. on the way home we got tickled talking about drew's gassy problems during the awards. at one point tim even had to take him to the car to change him but when he got there, the diaper was empty. so, he bundled him back up and brought him back to the rec hall where we were getting our prizes and awards. unfortunately, drew continued to let stinkers...we got a kick out of it because tim was standing back in a corner with about 20 people crowded around. i guess they all got some nice air freshening back there.

this is definitely a run that will be on my agenda for next year. it was a nice atmosphere, good socializing for a saturday morning and hey, you can't beat the free starbucks!

Happy Halloween!

2008-11-02T11:13:00.001-05:00

uncle joshie got me by my tail!

this year was drew's very first halloween. considering he only has three teeth, isn't quite a year old and has a 6:30 bedtime, we didn't do much trick or treating. on friday night i came home, dressed him in his lion costume, tried to paint on some whiskers and a nose, then we headed off to tim's mom and dad's. they only live a few minutes away so we were able to make at least that one stop on halloween night. tim called me as i was leaving school to tell me they had a gas leak in lexington and he wouldn't be making it home in time for the festivities....i was a little upset that he didn't get to see drew in his first halloween costume but what can you do? i'm sure he would have rather been there than working late, too.
yesterday we had planned on taking drew home to see my family. since his aunth colleen had bought him another halloween outfit, we decided to try it out on our visit. she had seen a zebra costume and yes, it was adorable. i couldn't believe he actually left the hood up on it the whole time. he wasn't able to crawl at his usual lightening speed on the hardwood floors, but he still got around pretty well. all in all, it was a nice first halloween. the best part? i didn't have to hand out candy while trying to keep the dogs from attacking some kid!

a few things....

2008-10-31T20:19:00.003-04:00

our first halloween was a hoot. i'll post pictures after i take drew home tomorrow to see my family all dressed up.
tommy, i'm sick of politics, too. the last month i've been teaching a unit on voting and democracy....things aren't quite what they seem and though i'm sick of election crap, it's been very eye opening to see and hear what the kids say....
i did not have a need to contact my attorney today....one day at a time i guess.
i avoided all trick or treaters tonight. is that awful that i don't want to hand out candy? they didn't even ring my doorbell this year. could it have been the ferocious labradoodle barking her head off? or perhaps waylon giving out a nice little tirade that could be heard throughout the neighborhood?
don't use eyeliner as facepaint....it's a pain in the butt to get off a little lion.
my child should have been a crow for halloween. i'm not sure when he'll talk since all he wants to do is call crows--that's about the only noise he's making these days. well, that and telling me "no, no, no!"
time will change tomorrow. i hate change. it doesn't matter what kind, i don't like it. i really do not like when time falls back....isn't the cold weather dreary enough in the winter without it getting dark at 3 pm?
can teachers have intervention charts? can i go to the website and make my own? if so, who will keep track of my performance for me?
i ran with a new lady tonight that really made me push hard. and we talked the entire run...talk about out of breath.
i am thinking more and more everyday about a half-marathon. i'm also thinking about a tattoo....very seriously.
i'm very proud of jennifer for taking on yet another duty.....wife, mother, student, worker times 2. do you sleep???
i love that even when angie is ticked off royally, you would never know by her actions. it's an awesome feat when you can be that upset and no one can even tell....how do you do it?!?!
enjoy the weekend....blog so i'll have something to read. tommy, don't take anymore bribes from politicians. jennifer, drink decaf when sampling. angie, enjoy a weekend with no company!

2008-10-30T20:11:00.002-04:00

thursday.

tired, sore.

restraining, filtering, trying.

it's really not friday?

ugh.

break.

crazy, wacky.

flailing, screaming, wiggling.

i'm a little stiff.

unbelievable.

friday.

happy, excited.

painting, enjoying, running.

if we're all lucky.

content.

"what would you say if...."

2008-10-20T19:02:00.005-04:00

with my first official 5K in over 2 years finished, i realize again the need i have to run. first of all, it is so much fun to run with the girls after a hard day of work and second, that thing they call a runner's high, it does exist and i like it. a lot.

mom and hay came with me on saturday morning to walk with drew while i ran. i'm not sure if my family understands how much running means to me. i know tim does, he's seen what happens when i don't. everyone knows i'm a little competitive, but it's not even necessarily that i am competing with others, it's more of a competition with my inner self. i know that sounds cheesy but i have a really hard time making that voice be quiet sometimes and finishing a run always does the trick. fellow runners understand the addiction, the obsession, the absolute need to run.

i don't want this to come across wrong, but running has become my sort of religion. now, i don't mean that in a pagan/athiest kind of way, i just think God always sends us something we need and i know i have been sent a love for something that makes me happy. running has gotten me through when i thought i was having a nervous breakdown, it's gotten me through panic attacks, it's gotten me through mamaw's breast cancer and now it's getting me to a place where i can have a little more confidence in myself.

anyway, something is on my mind with all these 5K's, 4 mile runs three times a week and good eating i've been able to do lately. :) tonight when tim got home, drew was already in bed so we started talking about our day. he was telling me about the weirdos he encounters while doing service work and i, of course, told him about my run today....how i felt, my time, distance, etc.

(like he really cares! :))

our conversation takes a turn when i say, "what would you say if...."

*insert hysterical laughter here*

he doesn't even let me finish, just starts laughing and saying "oh, no!"

i think he knows anytime i say those 5 words, something big is about to follow and he's learned to be a little wary of what i'll come out with next. in the end, i asked him what he would say if i wanted to train for a mini. i know he would be happy for me to do it, but i'm not sure he understands the commitment i need from him to watch drew on saturdays if i am going to train and do a long run then....after explaining it to him, he still says he thinks it would be great. and that's why i love him. :)

i really don't think i'll ever be up for a marathon, but a half would be a huge accomplishment. last spring 3 friends did it and i was so proud of them....and even though i was proud, i was so depressed that i wasn't part of it. it's something i have never, ever thought i could do. i have no idea what makes me think i could do it now with a baby, but i would definitely like to give it a try.

here are some pictures from our pumpkin run....yea WACO!

drew and i after the run

angie and jb

jennifer and ella....mother/daughter or twins?

i wonder if administrators do?

2008-10-11T19:58:00.002-04:00

i was downstairs just now, folding my 100th load of clothes today when tim said something that got me thinking....
as i was throwing his clothes to him to fold (since he hasn't done that in quite some time) and we were folding together, he said, "i've got to order some new work clothes." he's greeted with silence. crickets chirping. not even ruby was barking. it just hits me like a ton of bricks that nearly every other profession gives their employees some sort of compensation for their work attire. i shoot back a sarcastic "must be nice" comment and he tells me that even lowly, low-paid newscasters get a clothing allowance. ugh!
i'm not talking uniform or anything, but it would be nice for our employer to provide some sort of clothing stipend, polo, something for us to be able to wear that looks nice. lord knows i live for those days when i can just grab one of my waco shirts and throw it on, not having to worry about having a t-shirt on...but even those we have to pay for out of our own pocket. ragan brought angie and i a "fire kid" shirt the other day since we didn't realize we could have gotten one by listing our size on the order sheet as well. that's just one more "i don't have time, i'll just wear this" shirt i can add to my collection, and i thank ragan kindly for smuggling us one. :)
i wonder if administrators get some sort of allowance....i might have to look into that one. i'd bet $50 bucks that i don't have they do.
oh well, just another one of those cons in the profession we chose i guess. good thing the pros outweigh them on most days.....

Getting better....

2008-10-07T18:49:00.001-04:00

Since Drew has become mobile by crawling I haven't seen a moment of stillness in the house. Now, he's begun to try and walk. Yes, he's been cruising for the last several weeks but tonight he really took off with his little push walker. It was hilarious! We kept watching his little chubby legs just moving on their own....sometimes his face just had this look that said he had no idea how he was doing it, but he liked it. He's been pushing it on his knees but he's finally getting the hang of standing up. The little wheels move pretty fast so it's all he can do to keep up. My little bow-legged chunky monkey is growing up. :(

sunday mornings

2008-10-05T08:05:00.005-04:00

"There are many persons who look on Sunday as a sponge to wipe out the sins of the week.” - Henry Ward Beecher

sunday mornings are spent by the majority of people i know getting ready for church. this is how i grew up as well. we'd all get up, get showers, mom usually fixed a good breakfast and we fought over who was going to get more time in front of the mirror or with the hairdryer. (4 girls in the house and one hairdryer makes for a morning of not quite christian like attitudes.)
anyway, though i am thankful mom always took us to church, now i am equally thankful i can choose to not get up and go if i don't want to. my sunday mornings are much different now. they usually involve getting up at the crack of dawn (as i do every other morning), changing the morning diaper, then changing another one 20 minutes later after hearing a tell-tale grunting while drew crawls around, feeding the dogs and getting them outside for their morning romp, then running to make coffee as fast as i can.

now, tim is usually not home on weekend mornings....either off working or riding one of his bikes--mountain or dirt. this leaves me to do most of the morning chores, keep up with my own little irumba and make sure the dogs don't eat/chew/bark/run off to somewhere they shouldn't be.

this morning has really been no different...we did the diaper dance (while drew tries to bounce like tigger the whole time), then the dog duty, and finally COFFEE! once i got all this done, i gave drew a few things to play with and sat down to watch him....not good. like you ever just get to sit down and watch them. i immediately found my pant leg being pulled on and when i got up to get him, he took off at a crawl dale earnhardt would be proud of...as i followed, i realized drew was pretending to spit in the floor. a few weeks ago this was funny. we would pretend to spit and he would start laughing uncontrollably. now, he's trying it out for himself. this will probably end up with a report from the babysitter at some point and time....maybe i should warn her now.

after the spitting, he has also decided he is going to "roar" at everything i say. i'll say his name to get his attention, he turns around, smiles and roars....it's hilarious. thanks to mamaw and hayley for teaching that one the other day, it's gonna go perfectly with his halloween costume.

i love sunday mornings.

tidbits

2008-10-03T19:11:00.003-04:00

well, today was a gorgeous day. after last night i certainly didn't think i'd be saying that...drew decided he was going to stay up ALL night so we got very, very little sleep. (get ready, tommy, i know you're worried enough already!)

i guess i should start with last night. some of the girls from work picked me up and we all went to a movie then dinner. we went totally chick-flick and watched nights in rodanthe. the theater had only women and i'm very happy for all the men that didn't have to attend....they were spared many sniffles, sobs and sighs. the movie was good though i had an idea how things were going to end.

after the movie we all piled in and went to ruby tuesday's....after several wrong turns, ha! i was beginning to wonder if all the crying pam did had affected her driving skills. we ended up closing the place down and lucky for us, we were the only ones there. i think we did everything we always tell our kids not to do. we did not use inside voices for one...i think they probably heard us back in the kitchen. it was a very good time, enjoyed by all and i hope we do it again next month.

i ended up getting home around 11:00 and when i walked through the door, i could hear drew screaming at the top of his lungs. this scared me to death since tim was upstairs and obviously hadn't heard him. i ran into the bedroom and scooped him up....this was the beginning of a very long night. he wanted to play until 1:00, then when we would try to put him in his bed he would start screaming all over again. this isn't typical of drew so i knew something must be wrong. the only time i could get him to sleep was when i held him from 3:00-5:00 this morning. the whole night i kept having flashbacks of those first colicky months and i shuddered like it was a nightmare. oddly enough, he's been in a very good mood all day for a little boy that had no sleep last night. we realized about halfway through the night he was getting another tooth when he chomped down on tim's finger....that explained the screaming and not wanting to go to bed.

after a night of no sleep, i got up, put my running clothes on and was off to meet the girls for our run at eku. i just knew it was going to be a horrible run for me because of the no sleep thing but it actually ended up being good. we started a the stadium and ran the perimeter of campus, all the way down lancaster to downtown, to madison bank and back the same route to the football field. after our run we checked out the wellness center (which was very nice and i coveted the rock wall!) and then did something i've never, ever done before.....dun, dun, dunnnnn -- we weighed ourselves in the locker room on their industrial sized scale. not that i haven't weighed myself before, but i won't even let tim see my weight, much less another girl! jennifer and jeanne, you are sworn to secrecy and if that information ever gets out, i'm coming for you....:)

when i was on my way home my mom called and said she and mamaw were coming down....i went home, took a quick shower, got drew ready and headed back to town to meet them for lunch. we also went to wal-mart and i discovered something quite interesting. (i'll mention it later in my list of tidbits to think about.) we went to penney's where i got drew his first halloween costume, then headed home. whew, what a busy day! all this time, tim stayed home and stained the deck....what a guy!

okay, here are the tidbits i had to think about today:

i realized when we were at wal-mart it was the third of the month...if you have ever worked in the law/court, bank or pharmacy (or wal-mart) business, you know what the third of the month equals....checks. not working people checks, the other kind of checks. well, my realization was that with drew's one tooth sticking out like a badge of honor, we fit right in with the other wal-mart clientele....
while running, i think i get into such a zone that i probably ran out in front of several cars while crossing the street. that's a little scary.
drew's favorite new things to do are to climb on anything and everything, including the treadmill. he knows he isn't supposed to do it...once he gets up on it, he turns around to see who's watching, then smiles and laughs like he's really done something. today when i went to get him off for the hundredth time, i realized the treadmill is covered with dust. (bad sign #1) i went and got something to clean it off with and as i was wiping, i found an old french fry stuck under the belt....(bad sign #2). what does that say about my recent physical activity when the treadmill is covered in dust and french fries???
i thought i had ruined the bathtub two days ago when i was cleaning the carpet
shampoo-er. when i emptied it, all the water just sat in the tub and wouldn't drain. this afternoon i was finally able to work on it (since most of the water had finally drained). while using all my might with a plunger, trying to work out whatever was stuck in there, i look over to see the lever for the drain is pulled halfway up. i felt like such an idiot! i always put it halfway up when drew is in there so the water stays warm but doesn't get too deep....i guess i forgot to put it back down. tim found this hilarious.
the last tidbit goes along with the weighing one from above....given i wanted to cover the scale readout with both hands so jeanne and jennifer could not view my worth, it's odd that i came home and ate half a pizza all by myself after also going out to lunch at red lobster with the fam. why is it that we do that? am i the only one? when i still need to lose the last of this baby weight, i go home, eat a horrible lunch and a horrible dinner....oh yeah, i had a brownie and two mini-candy bars, too. and even though i don't feel good about that, i've even considered a hot fudge cake. ha! i guess if you're gonna do it, do it right.

shirts

2008-09-28T10:53:00.002-04:00

okay jennifer, here are some additional shirt ideas. i'm loving them all....

front: There is an itch in runners. ~Arnold Hano
back: We like to scratch it. ~Waco Runners
front: Runners just do it.
back: They run for the finish line even if someone else has reached it first.
A side stich is like a car alarm. It signifies something is wrong, but you ignore it until it goes away.
front: Waco Runners (i don't like the name but i can't think of anything right now.)
back: Making the pavement feel needed, one mile at a time.
Left. Right. Repeat.
front: Running is a state of mind.
back: It's called insanity.
front: *Name of running club*
back: I may be slow, but I'm still ahead of you.
If we played tag, you'd be IT forever. (Love it.)
front: *Name*
back: Pardon Our Dust.
front: I do today what you won't, so I can do tomorrow what you can't.
back: Just RUN.
I must confess, I could use some rest I can't run at this pace very long.
Never again until tomorrow - that's what running does to you.

Proof

2008-09-27T19:39:00.005-04:00

i was finally able to catch drew with his mouth open wide enough this afternoon to get a picture of his new tooth. yes, it's just barely there on the bottom, but it's taken him months to finally get it in. along with it has come the fussy-sillies. he's wanted me to hold him all day and he will cry one minute and be laughing the next. he's 27 pounds now so i'm officially exhausted by the end of the day. i had to include some other pictures of course....some of him eating his beloved rice puffs and some of him pushing his new book around. yes, pushing. he's decided everywhere he goes he has to put one hand on his book and push it around. it reminded me of the iRumba vacuum cleaner that runs into walls, backs up and goes a different direction all on its own. drew wasn't quite as technologically advanced today so everytime he pushed the book into something and it would go no further, he would put his head down on it and cry. it was kind of pitiful yet i found myself sitting in the floor laughing at him rather than helping him....oh well, he enjoyed himself regardless.

i've also found he has an affection for french fries like his momma....i had never given him one because i'm kind of anal about what he eats. i think because i eat so awful, so much junk all the time, i don't want him to even have a taste of those things. however, i turned around last weekend and mom had given him french fries. so, when he saw that i had some today, he crawled across the floor like a rocket to get to me....poor momma, i thought he was coming to sit in my lap but he just grabbed the fry out of my hand and shoved the whole thing in his mouth. when he wanted more and they were all gone, he had a complete and total meltdown. (no more french fries in his vicinity, that's for sure!)

Hooray!

2008-09-27T09:46:00.002-04:00

Drew finally has a tooth! As of Thursday morning, his very first tooth broke through. It seems a little late considering he's a little over 10 months but my mom assures me none of us had teeth until somewhere around this time. I suppose what they say is true, every baby is different.

There are a few other "hoorays!" this weekend....Angie and JB are running their first 5K this morning in Lexington. They're running for a great cause, the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation....I wanted Angie to get JB a shirt that said "Running to Save Second Base".

Also, our friend Ashley has had her baby boy almost 8 weeks early. She had an emergency c-section around 1:00 am Friday. Solon Gray is 3 lbs 15 oz and 17 1/4 inches long. Jennifer and I were able to see him in the NICU for a few minutes and he is perfect! Very small and skinny, but perfect and doing well, thank goodness.

I found while being back in the NICU that it may very well be a place I would want to try to hide and stay in! How amazing to see all those teeny-tiny babies working so hard to make a place in this world. I couldn't help but think what a wonderful job those nurses must be blessed with, especially when everything turns out well for mom and baby. It was very shocking and a little heartwrenching to see Solon at almost 4 pounds and think that Drew was almost one of those babies. I spent a week at Central Bap when I was 6 1/2 months pregnant....who knows if Drew would have even been able to survive being 14 weeks early at 2.2 lbs if they hadn't been able to stop my labor. The doctors did not have much hope for him had he been born at that time, telling me he would have underdeveloped organs and senses. What amazes me is that there were babies just like that in the NICU yesterday and they all seemed to be doing so well and were so peaceful. It was definitely an experience I think I needed. Had I been wheeled in there when I was in the hospital to see what could happen to Drew if I didn't take care of myself, I would have probably been much more adament about following the bedrest rules.....

Anyway, away from the reflection and back to the point of this blog--

HOORAY ANGIE AND JB!

HOORAY ASHLEY AND SOLON!

okay, a bit of guilt is coming over me....

2008-09-23T19:52:00.005-04:00

too much negativity now that i read the last post. i didn't delete it though because i need to get it out. anyway, here's some sweet to go along with that sour.

veiled references

2008-09-23T19:26:00.002-04:00

stayed after today.....veiled references to follow. if you were there, you know just what i'm talking about. if you weren't there but know who was, you'll also know what i'm talking about. if you were neither there nor know about it, but you work at the same establishment, you will probably understand as well. if you can't figure out who/what i'm talking about, forget it, just enjoy the sarcasm.

Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person
Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, you can be impossible?
If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping me.
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

make me late to get my baby so we can all discuss things that won't change while subtly insulting me....nice, i appreciate it. negative nancy is on the war-path tonight, please disregard my unpleasantness.

isn't it funny?

2008-09-21T19:38:00.004-04:00

i took drew to the horse park yesterday. my mom and dad were camping for the weekend, something we've done for the last 20 years probably. we always go for the international rocky mountain horse show....always interesting and entertaining. great for people watching.

anyway, i was pretty sure i would end up seeing my old college roommate. her sister rides horses and their family is always there. i hadn't seen my roommate in over 4 years, nor have i talked to her. i had no way of contacting her....everything had been changed--email, phone, address, etc. it was just one of those things i guess.

while we lived in the dorm together, everything went very smoothly. we loved each other. so when it was time for dorm life to come to an end, we moved in together in an apartment. oh, but it didn't take long for me to realize how different that would be. the summer went fairly well but by the time school started, i had a hard time. i still loved her to death, but some things are too much for me. (well, lots of things are too much for me, but who's counting?)

so when i saw her yesterday, she was pretty much the same. especially the half-drunk part. i wasn't surprised, just a little, well, i don't even know the word to describe it. this was one of the major problems in our relationship. i'm no tee-totaller, but come on. i think before yesterday i just still had that feeling of being angry with her and not knowing why. yesterday i realized i just felt kind of sorry. sorry we didn't keep in touch. sorry she didn't get to see me get married. sorry she didn't know i had a child, a house, a job, a life. i guess i miss the relationship we could have had but i faced the fact that it probably never could have gone beyond where it did.

i think maybe what it boils down to is that i'm a hard person to be friends with...i expect a lot from someone. things like honesty, loyalty, respect, responsibility, morals, values, etc. i guess maybe i expect too much out of people. my mom always told me that....i expect people to be exactly how i think they should be when i should really just let them be. i do have a hard time making friends, to this day i have a hard time. i don't trust people, i don't want to put up with a lot of people and i'm not willing to give a lot of myself because i'm afraid of how it will come back to bite me. maybe i just had experiences that weren't the best when it came to girls and friends growing up. most of my friends are boys....i see some of my (few) girlfriends now and sometimes envy the relationship they have with their girlfriends. i'm very self-conscious that i don't have that. i think i'm even more self-conscious because i kind of don't want that either. it probably all boils down to the fact that i'm horribly self-conscious and don't think a lot of myself and how i appear to others, either physically or through personality. with me, having an incredibly intelligent brother has always made me feel well, for lack of a better word, dumb. and having two gorgeous, tiny sisters has always made me feel inferior and gigantic. (hey, it's my world, i can't help how i think.)

i appreciate those few close friends i have even more after this weekend. i don't think they realize how much i rely on them to be able to talk to and vent. don't take it for granted girls, you really do make a difference in my life, whether you realize it or not.

to conclude, i really think seeing a professional would be a good idea for me. this isn't something new --it's already been suggested several times by both my mom and my doctor. maybe someday....when the voices get too loud, ha!

(Oooo, i did it again, using humor and sarcasm to cover up my true feelings....therapy, here i come!)

FRIDAY!

2008-09-19T18:24:00.002-04:00

Ooo, ooo, ooo, TGIF!
So, today is Friday and a few good/funny things happened.

Our 10 word spelling test took almost 15 minutes before I realized my kids kept asking me to repeat the words because they think the way I pronounce the words is funny. Who knew Friday really comes out FrI-dee when I say it. No wonder half of them failed.
One student spelled Thursday "Turdsbay" on her test today. This was read by me and followed by a hysterical bout of the giggles.....you know it's FridEE when you can't stop laughing.
I ran today. I ran 3 miles today. I finally felt good again. Thanks Jennifer and Jeanne.
:( Tim's mom called and asked if she could take Drew to her house for a few hours tonight so they could see him and give me a break. It's nice to get a break, but I miss him SOOO bad. Again, :( .
I got to see the pool tonight. It's almost finished, it just has to have the concrete poured around it. It's already filling up with water. I guess we have to get a sign that says "Drew's Pool".
Tomorrow we will go to the Horse Park for the annual International Show. I called my dad tonight and he was wild. I mean I enjoy it but jeez, it's just a flippin' horse. Mom says he's been that way all week.
I really wish Josh would come down tomorrow so Drew and I could see him. We didn't see him much last weekend and I'm afraid he's gonna move on me. That really doesn't belong in the good/funny pile, but I don't want to start a new one.
Ruby and Waylon didn't run off when I let them out this evening. Well, Ruby did a little but I was able to wrangle her back home. (This is a constant topic of contention in my house....bluh.)
Oh, and it's called spellcheck. (Angie, you know what I'm talkin' about and I know you're laughing, don't try to hold back. Have fun Monday morning! Waaahahahaha.)

More later I'm sure. Happy Weekend!

Some new favorites....

2008-09-17T21:15:00.006-04:00

Some new favorites....this is for all you teachers. :)

Where is this class going and why am I in this handbasket?
What is this 'free time' of which you speak?
Hard work, sacrifice and focus will never show up on tests.
When's recess?
Students reach new heights when teachers raise the bar.
I would prefer not to. -Bartleby the Scrivener
I never make mistakes. I thought I did once, but I was mistaken.
All children have gifts, they just open them at different times.
No, your OTHER right foot.
I'm sorry to hear that, now go do your seatwork.
You might be a teacher if you are in favor of people having a license before having kids.
"Official Shusher"
I do my own math stunts.
If you worked everyday with your kid x 25, you'd need your summers off too.
As a matter of fact, I am the grammar police.
I teach, therefore I am poor.
To save time, let's assume I know everything.
I'm confused. Wait, maybe I'm not.

And last but not least.......

No Child Left Behind: Keeping millions of No. 2 Pencil factory workers employed for years to come.

Surprise Mail

2008-09-17T21:15:00.005-04:00

Most of the time I don't like getting the mail in the evenings because it either contains junk or bills....two things I'm sure we all have more than enough of. Today I went straight in the house and left the mail for Tim to retrieve. When he came in he handed me a small envelope addressed to me. Immediately I recognized my mamaw's handwriting and had a feeling what the envelope would contain. Much to my chagrin, it contained a check and a note.

I don't know if you can see, but the note says,

"Sis, To buy gas to get to work---why? Because I love you. --Mam"

My mamaw is one of the most important people in my life. This note may not seem that odd to some of you but for some reason, my family has never really said "I love you" much. I think it's always been this unspoken creed that we love each other so much if we actually say it, we cry. It's odd because I tell Tim and Drew a million times a day but some of the closest people in my life have a hard time vocalizing that same phrase. Don't get me wrong, I've never really longed to hear it because I guess actions have always spoken much louder than words for us, it's just a little different than most families that are so close.

She's always been an inspiration, role model, caregiver, sounding board, ally, and rescuer for me. I think she is one of the main reasons I didn't turn down the wrong path growing up. Yes, my mom and dad definitely had a hand in that as well, but the thought of disappointing my mamaw makes me sick. She's a fighter and one of the most brave and faithful people I know. She taught be how to forgive, accept and love unconditionally while also teaching me the art of giving the cold shoulder instead of entertaining bad influences. I haven't been getting to see her as often as I would like but we talk on the phone several times a week. I often think that God sent us Drew as an incentive for mamaw to keep pushing on during her horrible chemotherapy. I found out I was pregnant after that first terrifying chemo treatment....from then on I think she had something to look forward to and not give up. I thank God everyday he has given me the opportunity to have such a special relationship with her.

Grandmas are moms with lots of frosting. ~Author Unknown

A child needs a grandparent, anybody's grandparent, to grow a little more securely into an unfamiliar world. ~Charles and Ann Morse

What children need most are the essentials that grandparents provide in abundance. They give unconditional love, kindness, patience, humor, comfort, lessons in life. And, most importantly, cookies. ~Rudolph Giuliani

(Mamaw still keeps me a stash of candy bars in the back of the cabinet!)

Grandma always made you feel she had been waiting to see just you all day and now the day was complete. ~Marcy DeMaree

Grandmas hold our tiny hands for just a little while, but our hearts forever. ~Author Unknown

Trial Run #1

2008-09-10T18:39:00.002-04:00

I couldn't wait until tonight to make the cupcakes and try out the fondant so I ended up doing it last night after I posted the previous blog. With this trial run I learned a few key things:

Don't let this stuff get warm, it's too hard to work with, no matter how much you think it will help.

Have very sharp instruments on hand, it's a pain in the butt to cut when it gets warm.

Make sure you use a dense, heavy cake mix. My cupcakes were too fluffy and just wanted to squish when I put the fondant on.

Luckily I only made one set of cupcakes and saved the rest of my batter for this weekend. (Either I would have eaten them all or ended up throwing them in the floor and stomping them out of frustration.) I only made one with the fondant covering it. I really think they are just more for looks than taste because the fondant is heavy....it just doesn't go well with the traditional kinds of cake I'm used to.

Luckily for me I didn't put fondant on all of them, that way I could eat one. (Or two!)...(Okay, okay, I had 3. Plus one at 3 am when I got up to get Drew's bottle. It doesn't count if you eat it in the middle of the night.)

Tornado Alley!

2008-09-09T18:29:00.007-04:00

Oh my, did I get myself into a mess tonight...As soon as Drew went to bed I decided it was time for me to start tackling my latest obsession: making Drew his 1st birthday cake, custom-style. Now, to most this would probably seem fairly simple however, I don't really enjoy cooking all that much. Actually, I just don't enjoy the cleaning up, the cooking isn't that bad. I can cook, my mamaw made certain of that, I just hate cleaning all the stuff up afterwards....and don't tell me you're supposed to clean as you go because that's a bunch of bull. I clean before, during and after and there's still a big mess.

So, back to my original thought....for the last few days I have been thinking a lot about Drew's upcoming birthday, (well, it's not until November but my OCD requires that I be well prepared), and trying to decide what kind of cake he will have. Since he loves dogs, I have decided to make a dog cake with cupcakes with dog themed shapes that are covered in that really cool, smooth icing professional decorators use. My friend Shannon also has her son's 1st birthday coming up (this Saturday) and she came to show me the cake she ordered for him yesterday. I didn't see it, but it is going to be a Very Hungry Caterpillar themed cake. I looked at the link of the lady's previous cake designs and was a bit overwhelmed. First, there's no way I can afford to purchase one of her custom cakes and second, I am really into doing special things for my first 1st birthday as a mommy.

(Here's a link to some pictures of similar cakes that are covered in fondant:

http://www.pinkcakebox.com/ )

Last night I came home and began researching these cakes and what I needed to do to begin my project. First, I had to find out what that fondant stuff was and where I could get it. Now, I could have taken the easy way out and ordered some, but it costs an arm and a leg and I wanted it now. Waiting 3-4 days for it to be delivered was not an option....again, OCD. So, after some searching, I found out how to make the fondant, yes, as in homemade. After going to Wal-Mart before picking Drew up today, I headed home and began getting my things ready. Now, my house is definitely lived in and is not the neatest with a baby, 2 dogs and a husband throwing things everywhere, but after I began my fondant making, this is what it looked like:

As the process went along, I began taking pictures of my work. Here is the fondant after I got it all kneaded and rolled out...

After separating and putting food coloring in half....

And finally, my kitchen after clean-up...ahhhh.

I have decided I would practice my cake making skills on Hayley and my dad this weekend. My dad is turning 50 next Sunday and Hayley will turn 19 this Sunday. We are having a big cookout and Mom and Dad's and she's having a cake made, etc., etc. I decided since I had an occassion, I would do a trial run. I am going to make cupcakes, ice them, then cover them with the green fondant. After that, I will attempt to make flowers to go on the top. Whether that comes together is a different story. When I get them done, I will post more pictures....maybe. We'll see how they look, then I'll decide if I would be too humiliated to post them!

10 years

2008-09-06T17:08:00.004-04:00

Today marks ten years that Tim and I have been together. Even though we were not married on this date, this is always the one we celebrate. To be honest, we have even forgotten what day we were married on a few times because September 6th has always been the "anniversary" we've counted.

Looking back, I think we both realize how much we've been through together and how amazing it is that we've never broken up. Now, this isn't to say there weren't some rough patches, especially during those college years. Not for one minute have I regretted dating just Tim. I've always been the kind of person that isn't willing to waste my time on something I already knew wasn't right. I think my family knew as soon as we started dating that we would end up married....mainly because I wouldn't even date anyone before Tim because I felt like it was a waste of time.

Tim has been my rock for the last ten years. I've given him my secrets, shared my dreams, cried my heart out and laughed myself to tears with him. He puts up with my craziness, he's comforted me when I couldn't take care of myself, and he's known when to leave me alone if I was just having a hard time being nice. My mom and mamaw have always told me I have no idea how good he is to me, that I should always treat him well. Hopefully I do and I know he appreciates me, God knows I couldn't have made it through a lot of dark days without him. Living with someone who suffers from depression is not easy-I've seen my mamaw deal with my papaw's depression for many years and I know the toll it sometimes takes on her. I can't imagine how Tim has felt over the years dealing with my angry outbursts, random crying fits, constant state of irritation and the days when it has been very difficult to even pull myself out of bed. There have been a few days when he's even pulled me up and out because he knew what was best for me all along. He's been a saint in that respect. Now I think he just thanks the Good Lord for medication. :)

From those first days of Story Hour I knew I liked this boy....now I know how wonderful he really is...what a good husband, best friend, companion and best of all, what a great daddy he is. I cannot imagine my life without him and thanks be to God for sending him to me.

This is going to be big trouble, I can feel it already.

Right after Drew was born. I thought Tim was going to pass out again. :)

Drew's first day home.

Teaching Drew how all about throttle.

My favorite Facebook Flair buttons

2008-08-30T10:24:00.002-04:00

i thought i should share some of my favorite facebook flair buttons with those of you who don't have facebook....some of them are just too true. :)
-sarcasm: the body's natural defense against stupid.
-best friends, because parents couldn't handle us as sisters.
-i work with kids for a living, what's your superpower?
-i wasn't kicking him, i was riverdancing and he got in the way.
-forgive your enemies, it messes with their heads. (this was on a church sign. )
-i make sarcastic comments during faculty meetings. (that's not nice.)
-sarcastic comments free with friendship.
-i have CDO. it's like OCD only the letters are in alphabetical order. (like they should be.)
-i'm afraid one day i'll meet God, he'll sneeze and i won't know what to say.
-i cried when sirius died. (really, i did. i cried harder when dumbledore died though.)
-silence is golden, but duct tape is silver. (one of my favorites.)
-"i told you so" has a brother. His name is "shut the h*ll up."
-why are so many liberals against killing terrorists, murderers and child rapists, but for abortion?
-when i hear the national anthem, i add the BOOM-CRASH!

almost friday!

2008-08-28T21:33:00.005-04:00

i am so excited tomorrow is friday. at this point in the week, i'm so tired i don't think it would matter if i went to bed at 8:00 and slept through the night. it's a good thing it wouldn't matter i guess since there's no chance of it happening. i feel like i have run myself ragged this week and i really haven't been able to see my baby as much as i'd like. i'm very happy we have a three day weekend coming up...i'm with my kids at school, we need a 4-day week every week.

i know everyone else is tired as well. i am thankful i haven't gotten sick yet. it seems like there are so many germs going around school. my window and door stays open to hopefully scoot those little buggers on out of the room. i definitely don't need to bring something nasty home to drew, even though when i picked him up today he was stopped up and congested....i thought he'd gotten over it last week but i guess it's back. :(

as you can see from the pictures below, this may be one reason i'm worn out. it's a good worn out, even though my butt never sees a couch or chair anymore. drew's new trick is to try and stand up. this includes using anything he can find as leverage resulting in numerous bumps to the head. he also loves to destroy paper, hence the mess in the floor. :)

Man on the loose!

if

2008-08-21T19:09:00.008-04:00

drew went to bed early tonight and tim isn't home so i've been dawdling on the computer reading different blogs. it's amazing what different people go through everyday. i'm always so thankful for the life i have been blessed with but it seems i should be even more thankful today. i'm not sure why, i'm a big believer in "signs" i guess, but today has just seemed to have come full circle for my thoughts.
i started out the day with a great deal of difficulty pulling myself out of bed....then pulling drew out of his cozy, warm bed. he's such a good baby, even when i get him up at 6:00 every morning he wakes up with nothing less than and ear to ear, toothless grin...if he happens to catch sight of waylon or ruby we might even get a chuckle. i have a wonderful husband who gets up to help me in the middle of the night or early morning and that just makes things so much easier. anyway, i digress....
on the way to work i turned on the radio to listen to my regular morning show and i hear they are doing their yearly radiothon for the children's hospital. you know the ones, where they play the stories of families who have had the misfortune of having a sick child who may or may not have beat the illness while sad, slow music is playing in the background. unfortunately for me, i'm a sucker for these stories. some of you are probably wondering if this is really me writing since most just see me as a cynical, no nonsense, blunt person...i've come to realize maybe this is one of the reasons i can't deal with emotions and must use a medicinal route to balance myself out. i think i keep a lot of the tenderness i have in my soul to myself, bottle it up and freak out when i can't put anymore in my bottle. that being said, i squalled all the way to the babysitter's this morning listening to a dad tell the story of his sweet little girl losing her battle with leukemia. the more i heard drew babble in the backseat, the more i cried. (luckily i don't do the mascara thing or i'd have been in real trouble.)
once i dropped drew off and kissed him 50 times before leaving, i got myself back in gear for another day at school. i realized then that there are so many kids i've had that i have really loved, mothered and wanted to keep safe and i almost started the waterworks again. i don't cry a whole lot but when i do, i can't seem to stop. now this evening i've just read a blog of a woman about my age with a daughter about drew's age and she's just suddenly lost her husband....then i watched that dang lion video where it runs to it's former owners after it had been in the wild for over a year or so and now i'm crying again. (if you haven't seen it, it's a must...go to youtube.)
maybe the cynic in me just wants to believe it's pms (that's for you jennifer) but then again, maybe there's a soft spot in me somewhere after all. i guess i know it's there, and god knows it's there and that's all that counts....
a few of my Achilles heel's:
`babies.
`sick babies
`mistreated and neglected babies
`animals...any kind, even the mean ones
`my mamaw
`feeling helpless when someone needs me
`those who seek something they may not have been blessed with yet...i'm faithful enough to believe the right thing will come along for you at just the right time.
`old people
`families of addicts...too much intervention for me i guess
`people who suffer with mental illness....i've seen how it can effect everyone around them

on a brighter note, i have more to add to "the things kids say" file:
me -"we're going to do a poster on good citizens and not so good citizens."
student-"well, which color are we gonna use for the good?"
me - "i'll let you decide since you came to help me."
student- after thinking for a few minutes as we walk down the hall-"okay, i think we should use yellow for the good. you know, like the sun is yellow and it's good, so we'll use the yellow for the good citizen."

student - "mrs. rosencrans, will you go throw that football again today and tire those boys out? i want them to be quiet when we go back in the room today."

student - "gosh mrs. rosencrans, i'm parched."

student - "you know, i'm half indian."
me - "oh really? like native american indian or india indian?"
student - "huh? you know, like an indian."
me - "oh, that kind....how did you find that out?"
student-"well, my dad told me."
me-"so that means your dad is a full blooded indian?"
student - "yep"
me - "what tribe is he?"
student - "i don't know, we'll have to ask my mom. i can't remember what they said."
so, we go ask his mom, she proceeds to tell him to go out in the hallway while she explains to me what he's talking about. evidently his dad sunburned his feet on the beach and they started calling him tenderfeet as his indian name....adding that he was of the "slap-a-ho" tribe. good thing he couldn't remember what kind of indian he was!

while studying continents this week, we have reviewed and tried to name them daily. student - "south america. mrs, rosencrans, is that where they have the other bible?"

and last but not least, the same student tells me he saw a sign that said "stop! mumbo-jumbo" on it. insisting that's what the sign said, we later found out it was a caution sign for wet floors that was written in spanish...somehow the spanish came out to say "mumbo-jumbo". :)

now to end, i'll leave you with some pictures of my gorgeous, big boy and my most favorite poem of all time.... it's been my favorite for years and years. i guess this is what i hope tim and i, along with our family and friends, can teach drew and any other children we may be blessed with as they grow up. i know it's what i try to be, even though i fail quite frequently....read it closely, they're very wise words.

IF

If you can keep your head when all about you

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you

But make allowance for their doubting too,

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,

Or being hated, don't give way to hating,

And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,

I
f you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken

Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,

And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

And never breath a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone,

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;

If all men count with you, but none too much,

If you can fill the unforgiving minute

With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,

Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,

And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!
--Rudyard Kipling

And it begins again....

2008-08-15T19:36:00.005-04:00

School, that is. Our first week is over and I'm worn out! I don't know what that says about my stamina since the kids were only there three days. I think the stress of worrying over how that first day will go, what kind of class we'll have and wondering how on earth we will ever get these kids to where they need to be by May takes a toll during that first week. I'm looking forward to next week when I feel like we'll get into our real routine.

Overall, this was one of my better first days....I think having Drew has made me a little more understanding of kids in general. That doesn't mean I'm gonna go soft, so don't worry about that one. It's just not in my genetic makeup to be a "blue". :)

I think I'm going to have some very interesting stories this year. I have several students who will keep me on my toes and always have something clever to say. I am going to try and keep them documented....especially since I always tell myself I'll write it down, then forget later. Here's a snippet of what may be to come....

1.) On the first day, Student J (as he will be referred to for blogging anonymity) comes to the door, stops and looks at me exclaiming, "That locker is awesome!" Who would have thought the most inspiring thing about my first day would be the excitement an 8 year old has over a midget locker?

2.) Day 2 - Student doesn't know how to spell a word and asks me to do it for him. My response was no, come and get a dictionary to look it up so you'll remember the next time. After searching for the word for 10 minutes, he finds it and writes it down on his "What I Did This Summer" paper. As he goes to return the dictionary, he whispers, "Thanks for letting me use the dictionary Mrs. Rosencrans, it was FABulous."

3.) Day 3 - I wore a dress today. Yes, me. I. Wore. A. Dress. So, Student J breezes into the room with his usual sweet smile and states, "Lookin' good, Mrs. Rosencrans." He doesn't stop, doesn't even slow his step....he just keeps truckin' to his desk and gets started on his morning work.

I forget sometimes the importance a kind word has....how lucky am I to know such a sweet kid, that he always has something nice to say. Even something like telling me a dictionary was fabulous made my day. I hope to have many more anecdotes from Student J throughout the year....he's almost as good as my medication.